PRAYING FOR CLEAN

Jacobson offers a memoir of sisterhood and dealing with addiction through faith and family bonds.

Growing up, the author always admired her sister, Pam. Pam was a straight-A student and an indomitable sports competitor, so it was no surprise when the college scholarship offers started pouring in. Pam had the world at her fingertips, and nobody doubted that she would succeed—until her final year of high school, when Pam started to change. She became irritable and aggressive, her performances in academics and sports declined, and her basic hygiene suffered. It became apparent that Pam was using drugs as she gradually drifted further from her family. Over the years, Pam became estranged, marring her core relationships by stealing from loved ones and lashing out in violent outbursts. Over a decade later, Pam returned to Jacobson’s life, pregnant and unable to care for the coming baby. What could have been a rock-bottom moment instead became the catalyst that shifted the tides of Pam’s life, as the birth of her daughter gave her purpose and rekindled her relationship with the author, who readily adopted the child. Jacobson takes great care to grant her sister the dignity she deserves while recounting the story of their shared struggles, divulging her own experiences to lend hope to others. She’s open about her feelings of shame and anger, and about the internal work she had to do before she could become a proper advocate for Pam. (“I often felt undeserving of any help because I was not the one living on the street, sleeping behind dumpsters…I came to realize that if I want to be a support to Pam, I have to accept help as well.”) She champions her faith in God and her commitment to advocacy for helping her find her way, and she encourages others to better themselves and find purpose in their own journeys of healing. Jacobson’s honesty and dedication to making a difference for people like Pam, along with Pam’s own resilience, are the narrative’s highlights, making for an emotionally moving memoir that espouses cultivating hope and compassion in dark times.

A call for healing and understanding that humanizes those struggling with addiction.