DETERMINATION

Lees discusses the challenges of obtaining a longed-for college degree more than 20 years after her high school graduation in this memoir.

It is difficult enough to begin college at 40 years of age; imagine embarking on this path while raising five children still living at home, including twins in second grade. When Lees was in lower school, she struggled with her studies, but by eighth grade she had figured out methods that worked best for her, and she was bringing home high marks. Still, when she entered high school, her father told her she was not “college material,” and her mother encouraged her to take secretarial courses. She did as she was told, becoming a legal secretary, marrying, and having five children. Her college dream was temporarily buried. Almost two decades later, her oldest daughter, Marie, who was experiencing some of the same learning challenges as the author, also wanted to go to college. By now, in the 1990s, there was terminology to describe her difficulties: Marie was diagnosed with ADHD and learning disabilities. Lees refused to have Marie academically sidelined, and she worked diligently to help her daughter negotiate both her classwork and her homework, all the time feeling insecure because she herself did not have a college degree. Then, the author learned about Camden County College, where she could enroll part-time to earn an associate’s degree and later transfer to a four-year college. In engaging and conversational (albeit occasionally repetitious) prose, Lees describes the obstacles she faced entering college without adequate academic preparation for the structure of college classes and expectations of the professors. Episodic in nature, with a rotating, occasionally confusing timeline, the memoir details the many stumbling blocks the author faced when finding her place in the college setting. The challenges became even greater when she was accepted into the University of Pennsylvania and her young classmates were already Ivy League-trained. Lees writes movingly of her fear of not being equal to them: “Inferiority had followed me to class tonight—I could feel her icy hands at my throat, cutting off my voice.” Still, she emerges victorious: “Life shouldn’t be thought of as avoiding failure, but rather accepting challenges.”

An inspiring tale with a triumphant conclusion.