“Caring for parents has become the new normal for boomers,” writes Morris. Readers will likely find other books on the topic...
A journalist’s memoir of coming to terms with the aging and deaths of his parents.
This book fits into what has become a genre unto itself, as baby boomers have reached the age where they are taking care of the parents who once took care of them, and advances of modern medicine have allowed some of those parents to live longer. By his own admission, Morris (Assisted Loving: True Tales of Double Dating with My Dad, 2008, etc.) was not a model caregiver, deferring much of that responsibility to his brother, and his parents weren’t what he would “have ordered from a parent catalogue.” The prelude to this “personal chronicle of ending” suggests that the book was inspired by the example of an acquaintance whose doting on his elderly parents stood in stark contrast to the author’s self-centeredness toward unwanted responsibilities and distractions. A travel writer, he found his trip to Scotland to sample Scotch ruined by the pleas from his brother to return home because their mother was dying. He didn’t want to interrupt his trip, but he could no longer enjoy it. His brother, to whom the book is dedicated, was “the family’s morality meter,” while the author was “more the wicked one…prodigal, cynical, and irresponsible.” After his mother’s death, his father embarked on a romance that seemed to revitalize him (and provided material for a theatrical performance the author mounted), but then he declined again. As the author tried to help his father through his depression and suffered the trials of caregiving, he sometimes seemed to wish his father had succeeded with his suicide attempt. “I’m all for the simple solution, the easy exit,” he says. Even his father complained about his son’s lack of commitment and compassion.
“Caring for parents has become the new normal for boomers,” writes Morris. Readers will likely find other books on the topic more illuminating and inspirational.Pub Date: June 2, 2015
ISBN: 978-1-4555-5650-2
Page Count: 192
Publisher: Twelve
Review Posted Online: Feb. 23, 2015
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 15, 2015
A moving meditation on mortality by a gifted writer whose dual perspectives of physician and patient provide a singular...
A neurosurgeon with a passion for literature tragically finds his perfect subject after his diagnosis of terminal lung cancer.
Writing isn’t brain surgery, but it’s rare when someone adept at the latter is also so accomplished at the former. Searching for meaning and purpose in his life, Kalanithi pursued a doctorate in literature and had felt certain that he wouldn’t enter the field of medicine, in which his father and other members of his family excelled. “But I couldn’t let go of the question,” he writes, after realizing that his goals “didn’t quite fit in an English department.” “Where did biology, morality, literature and philosophy intersect?” So he decided to set aside his doctoral dissertation and belatedly prepare for medical school, which “would allow me a chance to find answers that are not in books, to find a different sort of sublime, to forge relationships with the suffering, and to keep following the question of what makes human life meaningful, even in the face of death and decay.” The author’s empathy undoubtedly made him an exceptional doctor, and the precision of his prose—as well as the moral purpose underscoring it—suggests that he could have written a good book on any subject he chose. Part of what makes this book so essential is the fact that it was written under a death sentence following the diagnosis that upended his life, just as he was preparing to end his residency and attract offers at the top of his profession. Kalanithi learned he might have 10 years to live or perhaps five. Should he return to neurosurgery (he could and did), or should he write (he also did)? Should he and his wife have a baby? They did, eight months before he died, which was less than two years after the original diagnosis. “The fact of death is unsettling,” he understates. “Yet there is no other way to live.”
A moving meditation on mortality by a gifted writer whose dual perspectives of physician and patient provide a singular clarity.Pub Date: Jan. 19, 2016
ISBN: 978-0-8129-8840-6
Page Count: 248
Publisher: Random House
Review Posted Online: Sept. 29, 2015
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Oct. 15, 2015
PERSPECTIVES
Well-told and admonitory.
Young-rags-to-mature-riches memoir by broker and motivational speaker Gardner.
Born and raised in the Milwaukee ghetto, the author pulled himself up from considerable disadvantage. He was fatherless, and his adored mother wasn’t always around; once, as a child, he spied her at a family funeral accompanied by a prison guard. When beautiful, evanescent Moms was there, Chris also had to deal with Freddie “I ain’t your goddamn daddy!” Triplett, one of the meanest stepfathers in recent literature. Chris did “the dozens” with the homies, boosted a bit and in the course of youthful adventure was raped. His heroes were Miles Davis, James Brown and Muhammad Ali. Meanwhile, at the behest of Moms, he developed a fondness for reading. He joined the Navy and became a medic (preparing badass Marines for proctology), and a proficient lab technician. Moving up in San Francisco, married and then divorced, he sold medical supplies. He was recruited as a trainee at Dean Witter just around the time he became a homeless single father. All his belongings in a shopping cart, Gardner sometimes slept with his young son at the office (apparently undiscovered by the night cleaning crew). The two also frequently bedded down in a public restroom. After Gardner’s talents were finally appreciated by the firm of Bear Stearns, his American Dream became real. He got the cool duds, hot car and fine ladies so coveted from afar back in the day. He even had a meeting with Nelson Mandela. Through it all, he remained a prideful parent. His own no-daddy blues are gone now.
Well-told and admonitory.Pub Date: June 1, 2006
ISBN: 0-06-074486-3
Page Count: 320
Publisher: Amistad/HarperCollins
Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 15, 2006
© Copyright 2025 Kirkus Media LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Follow
Popular in this Genre
We can’t wait for you to join Kirkus!
It’s free and takes less than 10 seconds!
Already have an account? Log in.
OR
Sign in with GoogleTrouble signing in? Retrieve credentials.
Welcome Back!
OR
Sign in with GoogleTrouble signing in? Retrieve credentials.
