That portly porker, the Empress of Blandings, is ready for her third win in the Fat Pigs Contest, but Lord Emsworth's hopes shatter when he hears of Sir Gregory's fabulous entry, the Queen of Matchingham. Hon. Galahad Threepwood, on the move to nobble the Queen, is counterplayed by a drinking pigman and threatened by several romances, all bustling at once, etc.