An encouraging guide to a healthy mindset.
A survey of strategies for self-discovery.
Marriott, a group psychotherapist and clinical social worker, and Kelley, a psychologist, co-host the podcast Therapist Uncensored. In this collaboration, they offer thoughtful, well-supported advice for fostering personal growth and nurturing social bonds. Identifying themselves as a white, cis-gendered, middle-aged, same-sex married couple, the authors aim to be inclusive and supportive of all readers. As they point out, people of color or those who are neurodiverse or genderqueer have been shaped by distinct, sometimes traumatic, experiences. “Plumb your various identities,” the authors advise, and think about “the impact of your experiences on the protective and connective strategies you’ve developed, weighing their current usefulness.” Drawing on modern attachment theory and relational neuroscience, Marriott and Kelley look at how unconscious defensive patterns can be transformed into conscious strengths. The Modern Attachment-Regulation Spectrum (MARS), depicted as rainbow-colored images, serves as a colorful illustration of one’s state of mind, with green being a safe zone, gradations toward red indicating emotional activation, and gradations toward blue indicating defensive withdrawal. In an appendix, the authors provide a detailed analysis of the spectrum and its connection to behavior and emotion. The MARS, they write, can prove useful for readers “to recognize where you are and turn your focus toward scooting back towards the green zone rather quickly.” The authors present ways to reflect on behavior, recognize patterns, and work “to pause and try different strategies,” a process they call rewiring. “A secure state of mind,” the authors assert, “enables you to care about, advocate for and be generous with people close to you and those you’ll never meet. In this way, making the deliberate choice to prioritize secure functioning over falling back into defensive self-preservation is a powerful action that can disrupt, and even reverse” divisiveness and polarization.
An encouraging guide to a healthy mindset.Pub Date: April 30, 2024
ISBN: 9780063334557
Page Count: 352
Publisher: Harper/HarperCollins
Review Posted Online: March 11, 2024
Kirkus Reviews Issue: April 15, 2024
It’s not Shakespeare, not by a long shot. But at least it’s not James Franco.
A noted actor turns to verse: “Poems are a Saturday in the middle of the week.”
McConaughey, author of the gracefully written memoir Greenlights, has been writing poems since his teens, closing with one “written in an Australian bathtub” that reads just as a poem by an 18-year-old (Rimbaud excepted) should read: “Ignorant minds of the fortunate man / Blind of the fate shaping every land.” McConaughey is fearless in his commitment to the rhyme, no matter how slight the result (“Oops, took a quick peek at the sky before I got my glasses, / now I can’t see shit, sure hope this passes”). And, sad to say, the slight is what is most on display throughout, punctuated by some odd koanlike aperçus: “Eating all we can / at the all-we-can-eat buffet, / gives us a 3.8 education / and a 4.2 GPA.” “Never give up your right to do the next right thing. This is how we find our way home.” “Memory never forgets. Even though we do.” The prayer portion of the program is deeply felt, but it’s just as sentimental; only when he writes of life-changing events—a court appearance to file a restraining order against a stalker, his decision to quit smoking weed—do we catch a glimpse of the effortlessly fluent, effortlessly charming McConaughey as exemplified by the David Wooderson (“alright, alright, alright”) of Dazed and Confused. The rest is mostly a soufflé in verse. McConaughey’s heart is very clearly in the right place, but on the whole the book suggests an old saw: Don’t give up your day job.
It’s not Shakespeare, not by a long shot. But at least it’s not James Franco.Pub Date: Sept. 16, 2025
ISBN: 9781984862105
Page Count: 208
Publisher: Crown
Review Posted Online: Aug. 15, 2025
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 15, 2025
BOOK REVIEW
BOOK REVIEW
SEEN & HEARD
SEEN & HEARD
A sweet final word from an actor who leaves a legacy of compassion and kindness.
The late actor offers a gentle guide for living with more purpose, love, and joy.
Mixing poetry, prescriptive challenges, and elements of memoir, Heche (1969-2022) delivers a narrative that is more encouraging workbook than life story. The author wants to share what she has discovered over the course of a life filled with abuse, advocacy, and uncanny turning points. Her greatest discovery? Love. “Open yourself up to love and transform kindness from a feeling you extend to those around you to actions that you perform for them,” she writes. “Only by caring can we open ourselves up to the universe, and only by opening up to the universe can we fully experience all the wonders that it holds, the greatest of which is love.” Throughout the occasionally overwrought text, Heche is heavy on the concept of care. She wants us to experience joy as she does, and she provides a road map for how to get there. Instead of slinking away from Hollywood and the ridicule that she endured there, Heche found the good and hung on, with Alec Baldwin and Harrison Ford starring as particularly shining knights in her story. Some readers may dismiss this material as vapid Hollywood stuff, but Heche’s perspective is an empathetic blend of Buddhism (minimize suffering), dialectical behavioral therapy (tolerating distress), Christianity (do unto others), and pre-Socratic philosophy (sufficient reason). “You’re not out to change the whole world, but to increase the levels of love and kindness in the world, drop by drop,” she writes. “Over time, these actions wear away the coldness, hate, and indifference around us as surely as water slowly wearing away stone.” Readers grieving her loss will take solace knowing that she lived her love-filled life on her own terms. Heche’s business and podcast partner, Heather Duffy, writes the epilogue, closing the book on a life well lived.
A sweet final word from an actor who leaves a legacy of compassion and kindness.Pub Date: Jan. 24, 2023
ISBN: 9781627783316
Page Count: 176
Publisher: Viva Editions
Review Posted Online: Feb. 6, 2023
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2023
© Copyright 2025 Kirkus Media LLC. All Rights Reserved.
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