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IF I FIX YOU

A nuanced take on learning to fix yourself rather than fixing others.

A young woman struggles to regain her footing after walking in on her mother and the boy she’s loved since childhood.

It’s been five months since Jill Whitaker found her best friend, Sean Addison, in a compromising position with her mother. The day after, she found only a Post-it note; her mother was gone. Now, Jill’s left in a quiet house with a wounded father and unable to forgive Sean, the boy she’d dreamed of marrying since they were children. She spends her days in her father’s auto shop, trying to keep the mood light. One night, while sitting on the roof to escape the summer heat, Jill notices her new neighbor get into a violent argument with his mother. She throws a can of soda to distract them, breaking their window and subsequently sparking a slow-burning relationship with the boy, Daniel. The two lean on each other, sharing difficult stories of their parents. Only Daniel’s not in high school like Jill; he’s 21, and his scars run deeper than hers. As Jill defines her feelings for both Daniel and Sean in a clear, introspective voice, her mother returns, sending her into a tailspin. Each character’s pain is fully realized, and in spite of the love triangle, it’s facing the uncomfortable truths of damaged mothers that forms the pulse of the story. All the characters appear to be white.

A nuanced take on learning to fix yourself rather than fixing others. (Fiction. 14-18)

Pub Date: Oct. 25, 2016

ISBN: 978-0-373-21240-8

Page Count: 336

Publisher: Harlequin Teen

Review Posted Online: Aug. 1, 2016

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2016

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IF HE HAD BEEN WITH ME

There’s not much plot here, but readers will relish the opportunity to climb inside Autumn’s head.

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  • New York Times Bestseller

The finely drawn characters capture readers’ attention in this debut.

Autumn and Phineas, nicknamed Finny, were born a week apart; their mothers are still best friends. Growing up, Autumn and Finny were like peas in a pod despite their differences: Autumn is “quirky and odd,” while Finny is “sweet and shy and everyone like[s] him.” But in eighth grade, Autumn and Finny stop being friends due to an unexpected kiss. They drift apart and find new friends, but their friendship keeps asserting itself at parties, shared holiday gatherings and random encounters. In the summer after graduation, Autumn and Finny reconnect and are finally ready to be more than friends. But on August 8, everything changes, and Autumn has to rely on all her strength to move on. Autumn’s coming-of-age is sensitively chronicled, with a wide range of experiences and events shaping her character. Even secondary characters are well-rounded, with their own histories and motivations.

There’s not much plot here, but readers will relish the opportunity to climb inside Autumn’s head.   (Fiction. 14 & up)

Pub Date: April 1, 2013

ISBN: 978-1-4022-7782-5

Page Count: 336

Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire

Review Posted Online: Feb. 12, 2013

Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2013

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IF ONLY I HAD TOLD HER

A heavy read about the harsh realities of tragedy and their effects on those left behind.

In this companion novel to 2013’s If He Had Been With Me, three characters tell their sides of the story.

Finn’s narrative starts three days before his death. He explores the progress of his unrequited love for best friend Autumn up until the day he finally expresses his feelings. Finn’s story ends with his tragic death, which leaves his close friends devastated, unmoored, and uncertain how to go on. Jack’s section follows, offering a heartbreaking look at what it’s like to live with grief. Jack works to overcome the anger he feels toward Sylvie, the girlfriend Finn was breaking up with when he died, and Autumn, the girl he was preparing to build his life around (but whom Jack believed wasn’t good enough for Finn). But when Jack sees how Autumn’s grief matches his own, it changes their understanding of one another. Autumn’s chapters trace her life without Finn as readers follow her struggles with mental health and balancing love and loss. Those who have read the earlier book will better connect with and feel for these characters, particularly since they’ll have a more well-rounded impression of Finn. The pain and anger is well written, and the novel highlights the most troublesome aspects of young adulthood: overconfidence sprinkled with heavy insecurities, fear-fueled decisions, bad communication, and brash judgments. Characters are cued white.

A heavy read about the harsh realities of tragedy and their effects on those left behind. (author’s note, content warning) (Fiction. 14-18)

Pub Date: Feb. 6, 2024

ISBN: 9781728276229

Page Count: 416

Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire

Review Posted Online: Jan. 5, 2024

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 1, 2024

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