A thoughtful and well-written explanation of how to communicate.
A guide focuses on managing productive conversations in challenging circumstances.
This self-help book encourages readers to approach potentially fraught conversations with a clear understanding of goals, emotions, and boundaries in order to set realistic expectations and achieve the best possible results. Wonson explains her trademarked “Navigating Challenging Dialogue” process, which, she asserts, allows her to be “a steward of healthy conflict.” After describing her background in communication, relating how she learned to combat unhelpful emotional responses, and incorporating a smidge of neurobiology, the author lays out a four-step process for readers. With numerous examples drawn from her consulting clients, Wonson explains how to avoid emotional triggers, adjust assumptions, listen to the other party's responses, and maintain an open curiosity in order to reach an acceptable resolution. The author reminds readers that conversations can succeed when they accept that they only have control over their own emotions and reactions, not those of anyone else in the exchange, and adjust their expectations accordingly. The book’s discussion of how to respond to tears is particularly intriguing, offering strategies for reacting appropriately to strong emotions without making assumptions about how the other party is feeling. For instance, Wonson suggests saying “I see tears. Can you tell me what they mean?” before drawing conclusions about why a conversation has led to crying. The manual also does a good job of providing scripts that readers can employ when they need to pause a conversation in order to regain control of their own emotions. The volume’s many anecdotes are well chosen and serve to illustrate the more abstract concepts in Wonson’s framework, making it easy for readers to adapt it to their own needs. While the fundamentals of the process will be familiar to those who have read other works on healthy communication, the author’s clear explanations of how she came to understand and apply the common concepts make for an effective introduction. She builds a solid case throughout the text for the value of following the steps she enumerates.
A thoughtful and well-written explanation of how to communicate.Pub Date: Aug. 22, 2022
ISBN: 978-1-73645-893-8
Page Count: 178
Publisher: NCD Publishing
Review Posted Online: Oct. 24, 2022
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A conversational, pleasurable look into McConaughey’s life and thought.
All right, all right, all right: The affable, laconic actor delivers a combination of memoir and self-help book.
“This is an approach book,” writes McConaughey, adding that it contains “philosophies that can be objectively understood, and if you choose, subjectively adopted, by either changing your reality, or changing how you see it. This is a playbook, based on adventures in my life.” Some of those philosophies come in the form of apothegms: “When you can design your own weather, blow in the breeze”; “Simplify, focus, conserve to liberate.” Others come in the form of sometimes rambling stories that never take the shortest route from point A to point B, as when he recounts a dream-spurred, challenging visit to the Malian musician Ali Farka Touré, who offered a significant lesson in how disagreement can be expressed politely and without rancor. Fans of McConaughey will enjoy his memories—which line up squarely with other accounts in Melissa Maerz’s recent oral history, Alright, Alright, Alright—of his debut in Richard Linklater’s Dazed and Confused, to which he contributed not just that signature phrase, but also a kind of too-cool-for-school hipness that dissolves a bit upon realizing that he’s an older guy on the prowl for teenage girls. McConaughey’s prep to settle into the role of Wooderson involved inhabiting the mind of a dude who digs cars, rock ’n’ roll, and “chicks,” and he ran with it, reminding readers that the film originally had only three scripted scenes for his character. The lesson: “Do one thing well, then another. Once, then once more.” It’s clear that the author is a thoughtful man, even an intellectual of sorts, though without the earnestness of Ethan Hawke or James Franco. Though some of the sentiments are greeting card–ish, this book is entertaining and full of good lessons.
A conversational, pleasurable look into McConaughey’s life and thought.Pub Date: Oct. 20, 2020
ISBN: 978-0-593-13913-4
Page Count: 304
Publisher: Crown
Review Posted Online: Oct. 27, 2020
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Dec. 1, 2020
BOOK REVIEW
A sweet final word from an actor who leaves a legacy of compassion and kindness.
The late actor offers a gentle guide for living with more purpose, love, and joy.
Mixing poetry, prescriptive challenges, and elements of memoir, Heche (1969-2022) delivers a narrative that is more encouraging workbook than life story. The author wants to share what she has discovered over the course of a life filled with abuse, advocacy, and uncanny turning points. Her greatest discovery? Love. “Open yourself up to love and transform kindness from a feeling you extend to those around you to actions that you perform for them,” she writes. “Only by caring can we open ourselves up to the universe, and only by opening up to the universe can we fully experience all the wonders that it holds, the greatest of which is love.” Throughout the occasionally overwrought text, Heche is heavy on the concept of care. She wants us to experience joy as she does, and she provides a road map for how to get there. Instead of slinking away from Hollywood and the ridicule that she endured there, Heche found the good and hung on, with Alec Baldwin and Harrison Ford starring as particularly shining knights in her story. Some readers may dismiss this material as vapid Hollywood stuff, but Heche’s perspective is an empathetic blend of Buddhism (minimize suffering), dialectical behavioral therapy (tolerating distress), Christianity (do unto others), and pre-Socratic philosophy (sufficient reason). “You’re not out to change the whole world, but to increase the levels of love and kindness in the world, drop by drop,” she writes. “Over time, these actions wear away the coldness, hate, and indifference around us as surely as water slowly wearing away stone.” Readers grieving her loss will take solace knowing that she lived her love-filled life on her own terms. Heche’s business and podcast partner, Heather Duffy, writes the epilogue, closing the book on a life well lived.
A sweet final word from an actor who leaves a legacy of compassion and kindness.Pub Date: Jan. 24, 2023
ISBN: 9781627783316
Page Count: 176
Publisher: Viva Editions
Review Posted Online: Feb. 6, 2023
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2023
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