A holistic and refreshingly human approach to interpersonal communication.
A briskly presented program for improving the ways individuals speak—and how they’re heard by others.
CEO Harbridge (Your Professionalism Is Killing You, 2008) produces a management handbook with far broader applications, a manual for interacting that stresses sensitivity over pronouncements. “Influence is not only based on how we talk,” she writes, “but also on how we listen and how we make people feel understood.” This axiom is at the heart of her Context Model, a method of carefully gauging how you speak by meticulously evaluating your listeners. One of the central tenets of the Context Model is honesty, which Harbridge recommends in both ethical and practical terms. “Most of us just aren’t good enough at being fake in the long term,” she points out. “We call this natural inclination our ‘operating system.’ ” Mapping this system onto the values and viewpoints of others is key to the Context Model—the realization that a person’s core message radiates outward in steadily thinning and simplifying waves, moving from the isolated and specific to the general. This model—and the many stories Harbridge uses to illustrate her points—emphasizes the overriding importance of context, both sensing it and providing it. Harbridge repeatedly reminds her readers that mastering the nuances of context in order to increase your influence on others is a gradual process of trial and error. “Do not expect rainbows and unicorns to suddenly appear around you,” she writes. “Influence is iterative: The results will be inconsistent because every human is different.” By reminding her readers of clear-minded actions like “be a student” or “stay open,” Harbridge actually broadens the applicability of her precepts beyond the business world that is her obvious main concentration. Her writing is clear and full of easy, readable dictums. Perusers of business manuals should find some old paradigms offered in vigorous new ways. And general-interest readers will likely find much in these pages to improve their own daily dealings with colleagues and others.
A holistic and refreshingly human approach to interpersonal communication.Pub Date: May 1, 2017
ISBN: 978-0-9972962-4-2
Page Count: 184
Publisher: Nothing But The Truth Publishing
Review Posted Online: March 31, 2017
Kirkus Reviews Issue: May 15, 2017
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
These platitudes need perspective; better to buy the books they came from.
A lightweight collection of self-help snippets from the bestselling author.
What makes a quote a quote? Does it have to be quoted by someone other than the original author? Apparently not, if we take Strayed’s collection of truisms as an example. The well-known memoirist (Wild), novelist (Torch), and radio-show host (“Dear Sugar”) pulls lines from her previous pages and delivers them one at a time in this small, gift-sized book. No excerpt exceeds one page in length, and some are only one line long. Strayed doesn’t reference the books she’s drawing from, so the quotes stand without context and are strung together without apparent attention to structure or narrative flow. Thus, we move back and forth from first-person tales from the Pacific Crest Trail to conversational tidbits to meditations on grief. Some are astoundingly simple, such as Strayed’s declaration that “Love is the feeling we have for those we care deeply about and hold in high regard.” Others call on the author’s unique observations—people who regret what they haven’t done, she writes, end up “mingy, addled, shrink-wrapped versions” of themselves—and offer a reward for wading through obvious advice like “Trust your gut.” Other quotes sound familiar—not necessarily because you’ve read Strayed’s other work, but likely due to the influence of other authors on her writing. When she writes about blooming into your own authenticity, for instance, one is immediately reminded of Anaïs Nin: "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” Strayed’s true blossoming happens in her longer works; while this collection might brighten someone’s day—and is sure to sell plenty of copies during the holidays—it’s no substitute for the real thing.
These platitudes need perspective; better to buy the books they came from.Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2015
ISBN: 978-1-101-946909
Page Count: 160
Publisher: Knopf
Review Posted Online: Aug. 15, 2015
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2015
Doyle offers another lucid, inspiring chronicle of female empowerment and the rewards of self-awareness and renewal.
More life reflections from the bestselling author on themes of societal captivity and the catharsis of personal freedom.
In her third book, Doyle (Love Warrior, 2016, etc.) begins with a life-changing event. “Four years ago,” she writes, “married to the father of my three children, I fell in love with a woman.” That woman, Abby Wambach, would become her wife. Emblematically arranged into three sections—“Caged,” “Keys,” “Freedom”—the narrative offers, among other elements, vignettes about the soulful author’s girlhood, when she was bulimic and felt like a zoo animal, a “caged girl made for wide-open skies.” She followed the path that seemed right and appropriate based on her Catholic upbringing and adolescent conditioning. After a downward spiral into “drinking, drugging, and purging,” Doyle found sobriety and the authentic self she’d been suppressing. Still, there was trouble: Straining an already troubled marriage was her husband’s infidelity, which eventually led to life-altering choices and the discovery of a love she’d never experienced before. Throughout the book, Doyle remains open and candid, whether she’s admitting to rigging a high school homecoming court election or denouncing the doting perfectionism of “cream cheese parenting,” which is about “giving your children the best of everything.” The author’s fears and concerns are often mirrored by real-world issues: gender roles and bias, white privilege, racism, and religion-fueled homophobia and hypocrisy. Some stories merely skim the surface of larger issues, but Doyle revisits them in later sections and digs deeper, using friends and familial references to personify their impact on her life, both past and present. Shorter pieces, some only a page in length, manage to effectively translate an emotional gut punch, as when Doyle’s therapist called her blooming extramarital lesbian love a “dangerous distraction.” Ultimately, the narrative is an in-depth look at a courageous woman eager to share the wealth of her experiences by embracing vulnerability and reclaiming her inner strength and resiliency.
Doyle offers another lucid, inspiring chronicle of female empowerment and the rewards of self-awareness and renewal.Pub Date: March 10, 2020
ISBN: 978-1-9848-0125-8
Page Count: 352
Publisher: Dial Books
Review Posted Online: Dec. 21, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 15, 2020
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