A profound reflection on the years following a spouse’s death.
The poignant and searing account of a woman’s tragic loss.
Bell’s marriage was a modern-day fairy tale until the unthinkable happened. Nestled in a tight family with her husband, Matt, and adorable 4-year-old daughter, Ava, Bell lived the busy life of a wife and mother. Matt, a pilot working for UPS, was frequently away on business, flying cargo planes all over the world. The couple of 14 years remained close, however, establishing code words like “olive juice” for “I love you” when on the phone. Each trip began and ended with kisses and was filled with sweet text messages in between, until Matt’s trip to Dubai on Sept. 3, 2010. Bell’s morning rush of getting a fax out, taking Ava to pre-K, and making her doctor’s appointment was punctuated with the usual harried but intimate communication with Matt as he prepared for the final leg of his trip—only this time, he didn’t come home. Hours after her last text message from him, Bell was stunned to receive the tragic news that Matt’s plane caught fire and crashed; he didn’t survive. Overwhelmed with shock, grief, and despair, Bell spent the next year of her life in a haze of tears and suicidal thoughts. But alongside every hard adjustment and painful memory was the equally strong sense that Matt was at Bell’s side, guiding her and Ava as they navigated this difficult time. Both devastating and uplifting, Bell’s story is a tribute to her husband and a comforting tale of working through the stages of grief. Her straightforward prose and candid details make this an engaging read despite the sadness. While Bell writes close to the heart and shares a grief that is profoundly personal, anyone who has mourned a loved one will connect to her bewilderment at losing Matt and the shocking discovery that she can, in fact, survive his absence. Told with grace, sensitivity, and love, this is a worthwhile read sure to touch the heart.
A profound reflection on the years following a spouse’s death.Pub Date: July 25, 2014
ISBN: 978-0990643814
Page Count: 264
Publisher: CreateSpace
Review Posted Online: April 30, 2015
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
An intriguing approach to identifying and relating to one’s emotions.
An analysis of our emotions and the skills required to understand them.
We all have emotions, but how many of us have the vocabulary to accurately describe our experiences or to understand how our emotions affect the way we act? In this guide to help readers with their emotions, Brackett, the founding director of Yale University’s Center for Emotional Intelligence, presents a five-step method he calls R.U.L.E.R.: We need to recognize our emotions, understand what has caused them, be able to label them with precise terms and descriptions, know how to safely and effectively express them, and be able to regulate them in productive ways. The author walks readers through each step and provides an intriguing tool to use to help identify a specific emotion. Brackett introduces a four-square grid called a Mood Meter, which allows one to define where an emotion falls based on pleasantness and energy. He also uses four colors for each quadrant: yellow for high pleasantness and high energy, red for low pleasantness and high energy, green for high pleasantness and low energy, and blue for low pleasantness and low energy. The idea is to identify where an emotion lies in this grid in order to put the R.U.L.E.R. method to good use. The author’s research is wide-ranging, and his interweaving of his personal story with the data helps make the book less academic and more accessible to general readers. It’s particularly useful for parents and teachers who want to help children learn to handle difficult emotions so that they can thrive rather than be overwhelmed by them. The author’s system will also find use in the workplace. “Emotions are the most powerful force inside the workplace—as they are in every human endeavor,” writes Brackett. “They influence everything from leadership effectiveness to building and maintaining complex relationships, from innovation to customer relations.”
An intriguing approach to identifying and relating to one’s emotions.Pub Date: Sept. 3, 2019
ISBN: 978-1-250-21284-9
Page Count: 320
Publisher: Celadon Books
Review Posted Online: June 22, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 15, 2019
A highly readable account of how solid research and personal testing of self-help techniques saved a couple's marriage after...
Self-help advice and personal reflections on avoiding spousal fights while raising children.
Before her daughter was born, bestselling author Dunn (Why Is My Mother Getting a Tattoo?: And Other Questions I Wish I Never Had to Ask, 2009, etc.) enjoyed steady work and a happy marriage. However, once she became a mother, there never seemed to be enough time, sleep, and especially help from her husband. Little irritations became monumental obstacles between them, which led to major battles. Consequently, they turned to expensive couples' therapy to help them regain some peace in life. In a combination of memoir and advice that can be found in most couples' therapy self-help books, Dunn provides an inside look at her own vexing issues and the solutions she and her husband used to prevent them from appearing in divorce court. They struggled with age-old battles fought between men and women—e.g., frequency of sex, who does more housework, who should get up with the child in the middle of the night, why women need to have a clean house, why men need more alone time, and many more. What Dunn learned via therapy, talks with other parents, and research was that there is no perfect solution to the many dynamics that surface once couples become parents. But by using time-tested techniques, she and her husband learned to listen, show empathy, and adjust so that their former status as a happy couple could safely and peacefully morph into a happy family. Readers familiar with Dunn's honest and humorous writing will appreciate the behind-the-scenes look at her own semi-messy family life, and those who need guidance through the rough spots can glean advice while being entertained—all without spending lots of money on couples’ therapy.
A highly readable account of how solid research and personal testing of self-help techniques saved a couple's marriage after the birth of their child.Pub Date: March 21, 2017
ISBN: 978-0-316-26710-6
Page Count: 272
Publisher: Little, Brown
Review Posted Online: Jan. 17, 2017
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 1, 2017
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