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THE PSYCHOLOGY OF DENIAL

THE COMPLEXITIES OF A SIMPLE IDEA

A flawed but standout effort that rewards readers with new understanding.

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A psychotherapist looks at the complexities of denial and suggests ways to gently and gradually gain some control over denial-based behaviors.

Wright puts everyone, including himself, on the couch to make the case that denial is among life’s greatest limiters, but it typically escapes our notice. In fact, he explains, we’re often deeply and disadvantageously invested in not noticing what we’re ignoring. We may cling to a miserable status quo owing to a fear of change and low self-esteem. Worse, invoking willpower to overcome excessive drinking, overeating, smoking or nail biting will likely fail repeatedly and make us feel helpless to change until we understand what drives our willful ignorance. Only when we begin the painful work of clearing away the clouds of our denial, the author maintains, can we hope to make measured progress toward transformation. Patience, persistence and self-empathy then allow for small, successive feats of progress—though not great leaps—as we begin to counteract genetically predisposed, neurologically ingrained behaviors that may go back to infancy and childhood. At its best, this book of high intent provokes healthy if uncomfortable introspection. Many are likely to have flashes illuminating their own particular denial pathology, and for them, the author’s admonition to accept some responsibility while avoiding self-blame is helpful. Wright concedes that what fills pages here abbreviates tomes of material, and this leads to some paragraphs and sentences that need further explanation. But he also writes with impact, as when he discusses empathy: “When we are in denial, we aren’t even walking in our own shoes.”

A flawed but standout effort that rewards readers with new understanding. 

Pub Date: Sept. 11, 2012

ISBN: 978-1475053050

Page Count: 270

Publisher: CreateSpace

Review Posted Online: Nov. 21, 2012

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 1, 2013

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THE CULTURE MAP

BREAKING THROUGH THE INVISIBLE BOUNDARIES OF GLOBAL BUSINESS

These are not hard and fast rules, but Meyer delivers important reading for those engaged in international business.

A helpful guide to working effectively with people from other cultures.

“The sad truth is that the vast majority of managers who conduct business internationally have little understanding about how culture is impacting their work,” writes Meyer, a professor at INSEAD, an international business school. Yet they face a wider array of work styles than ever before in dealing with clients, suppliers and colleagues from around the world. When is it best to speak or stay quiet? What is the role of the leader in the room? When working with foreign business people, failing to take cultural differences into account can lead to frustration, misunderstanding or worse. Based on research and her experiences teaching cross-cultural behaviors to executive students, the author examines a handful of key areas. Among others, they include communicating (Anglo-Saxons are explicit; Asians communicate implicitly, requiring listeners to read between the lines), developing a sense of trust (Brazilians do it over long lunches), and decision-making (Germans rely on consensus, Americans on one decider). In each area, the author provides a “culture map scale” that positions behaviors in more than 20 countries along a continuum, allowing readers to anticipate the preferences of individuals from a particular country: Do they like direct or indirect negative feedback? Are they rigid or flexible regarding deadlines? Do they favor verbal or written commitments? And so on. Meyer discusses managers who have faced perplexing situations, such as knowledgeable team members who fail to speak up in meetings or Indians who offer a puzzling half-shake, half-nod of the head. Cultural differences—not personality quirks—are the motivating factors behind many behavioral styles. Depending on our cultures, we understand the world in a particular way, find certain arguments persuasive or lacking merit, and consider some ways of making decisions or measuring time natural and others quite strange.

These are not hard and fast rules, but Meyer delivers important reading for those engaged in international business.

Pub Date: May 27, 2014

ISBN: 978-1-61039-250-1

Page Count: 288

Publisher: PublicAffairs

Review Posted Online: April 15, 2014

Kirkus Reviews Issue: May 1, 2014

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THE 48 LAWS OF POWER

If the authors are serious, this is a silly, distasteful book. If they are not, it’s a brilliant satire.

The authors have created a sort of anti-Book of Virtues in this encyclopedic compendium of the ways and means of power.

Everyone wants power and everyone is in a constant duplicitous game to gain more power at the expense of others, according to Greene, a screenwriter and former editor at Esquire (Elffers, a book packager, designed the volume, with its attractive marginalia). We live today as courtiers once did in royal courts: we must appear civil while attempting to crush all those around us. This power game can be played well or poorly, and in these 48 laws culled from the history and wisdom of the world’s greatest power players are the rules that must be followed to win. These laws boil down to being as ruthless, selfish, manipulative, and deceitful as possible. Each law, however, gets its own chapter: “Conceal Your Intentions,” “Always Say Less Than Necessary,” “Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy,” and so on. Each chapter is conveniently broken down into sections on what happened to those who transgressed or observed the particular law, the key elements in this law, and ways to defensively reverse this law when it’s used against you. Quotations in the margins amplify the lesson being taught. While compelling in the way an auto accident might be, the book is simply nonsense. Rules often contradict each other. We are told, for instance, to “be conspicuous at all cost,” then told to “behave like others.” More seriously, Greene never really defines “power,” and he merely asserts, rather than offers evidence for, the Hobbesian world of all against all in which he insists we live. The world may be like this at times, but often it isn’t. To ask why this is so would be a far more useful project.

If the authors are serious, this is a silly, distasteful book. If they are not, it’s a brilliant satire.

Pub Date: Sept. 1, 1998

ISBN: 0-670-88146-5

Page Count: 430

Publisher: Viking

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 15, 1998

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