A self-help book that explores the many different causes and types of grieving.
Cappello (Soul Exercises for the Open Mind, 2015, etc.) explores various manifestations of grief in this study—from feeling like a victim to bullying others to addiction and depression. Loss isn’t always accidental or shocking, the author points out, and it’s sometimes self-inflicted, but grief can still set in, all the same. He recognizes the universal need for coping practices that can help people to avoid becoming stuck in a cycle of despair. The book prominently notes that calling on virtues, such as compassion and empathy, can help one push through stages of the grieving process, including anger and denial. Cappello also stresses the importance of other virtues, such as steadfastness, thrift, gratitude, reliability, and chastity, which he says can help build one’s self-worth. The book is divided into two parts, with the first looking at grief from a broad perspective and the second exploring specific types of grieving and related healing practices. Throughout, the author relays illustrative stories and anecdotes about his clients as a psychic medium. From its very first pages, this guide effectively reinforces the idea that one shouldn’t pass judgment on other people’s grief—a refreshing approach that avoids normative statements about how to cope with loss. In all, this is a unique guide that provides useful strategies for emotional growth after a loved one’s death. Interestingly, the author uses the first letters of each chapter title to create an acronym (spelling out “HEAL THE HEART”), with each chapter addressing an important element of recovery (“Healing Requires Making a Decision,” “Expressing Gratitude,” “Adaptability,” and so on). The affirmations (such as “I deserve to be happy and live a fulfilled life”) and practical guidance at the end of each chapter make this book a particularly powerful coping tool.
A personal, conversational guide to successfully working through loss.