An effective manual that offers a wide-ranging survey of the grieving process.
A guide that aims to help readers deal with grief in a feasible, step-by-step manner.
When DeMarco’s father died of Lou Gehrig’s disease, it was the latest in a series of losses that sent her into a depression. She decided to learn more about psychology and human behavior, which eventually led her to the psychotherapy approach known as neuro-linguistic programming, of which she later became a certified practitioner. In this book, she shares elements of this approach. Grief is a heavy topic, but in this manual, the author manages to transform it into something less abstract—something tangible that one can grasp by laying out its details. Along the way, DeMarco does a good job of providing relatable analogies; for instance, at various points, she compares self-awareness to a bag of frozen peas that one puts on a stubbed toe, and she likens grief to an infected cut. Essentially, she encourages readers to let go of pain and sorrow; to embrace the changes that come afterward; and to forgive themselves, as well as the person they’re grieving. As in other self-help guides, DeMarco includes hands-on activities that will engage readers and allow them to put the lessons into practice. Throughout, she speaks in an encouraging tone that will enable readers to face their process head-on. For example, after prompting the reader to buy a journal and write out all their feelings, she says, “If you’re going to weep into your pages, smudging ink, and curling the page corners, then do so and make your writing unapologetic.” The author also usefully broadens her definition of grief, identifying it as a loss of a relationship—whether it’s because someone died or because someone simply stepped away from the reader’s life. This allows the author to provide examples of the latter case (as when she discusses her own divorce), resulting in a nuanced view of grief that readers don’t often see.
An effective manual that offers a wide-ranging survey of the grieving process.Pub Date: Sept. 24, 2021
ISBN: 979-8481888606
Page Count: 188
Publisher: Independently Published
Review Posted Online: Oct. 18, 2021
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
If the authors are serious, this is a silly, distasteful book. If they are not, it’s a brilliant satire.
The authors have created a sort of anti-Book of Virtues in this encyclopedic compendium of the ways and means of power.
Everyone wants power and everyone is in a constant duplicitous game to gain more power at the expense of others, according to Greene, a screenwriter and former editor at Esquire (Elffers, a book packager, designed the volume, with its attractive marginalia). We live today as courtiers once did in royal courts: we must appear civil while attempting to crush all those around us. This power game can be played well or poorly, and in these 48 laws culled from the history and wisdom of the world’s greatest power players are the rules that must be followed to win. These laws boil down to being as ruthless, selfish, manipulative, and deceitful as possible. Each law, however, gets its own chapter: “Conceal Your Intentions,” “Always Say Less Than Necessary,” “Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy,” and so on. Each chapter is conveniently broken down into sections on what happened to those who transgressed or observed the particular law, the key elements in this law, and ways to defensively reverse this law when it’s used against you. Quotations in the margins amplify the lesson being taught. While compelling in the way an auto accident might be, the book is simply nonsense. Rules often contradict each other. We are told, for instance, to “be conspicuous at all cost,” then told to “behave like others.” More seriously, Greene never really defines “power,” and he merely asserts, rather than offers evidence for, the Hobbesian world of all against all in which he insists we live. The world may be like this at times, but often it isn’t. To ask why this is so would be a far more useful project.
If the authors are serious, this is a silly, distasteful book. If they are not, it’s a brilliant satire.Pub Date: Sept. 1, 1998
ISBN: 0-670-88146-5
Page Count: 430
Publisher: Viking
Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010
Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 15, 1998
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BOOK REVIEW
BOOK TO SCREEN
Fans will find comfort in Lawson’s dependably winning mix of shameless irreverence, wicked humor, and vulnerability.
The Bloggess is back to survey the hazards and hilarity of imperfection.
Lawson is a wanderer. Whether on her award-winning blog or in the pages of her bestselling books, she reliably takes readers to places they weren’t even aware they wanted to go—e.g., shopping for dog condoms or witnessing what appears to be a satanic ritual. Longtime fans of the author’s prose know that the destinations really aren’t the point; it’s the laugh-out-loud, tears-streaming-down-your-face journeys that make her writing so irresistible. This book is another solid collection of humorous musings on everyday life, or at least the life of a self-described “super introvert” who has a fantastic imagination and dozens of chosen spirit animals. While Furiously Happy centered on the idea of making good mental health days exceptionally good, her latest celebrates the notion that being broken is beautiful—or at least nothing to be ashamed of. “I have managed to fuck shit up in shockingly impressive ways and still be considered a fairly acceptable person,” writes Lawson, who has made something of an art form out of awkward confessionals. For example, she chronicles a mix-up at the post office that left her with a “big ol’ sack filled with a dozen small squishy penises [with] smiley faces painted on them.” It’s not all laughs, though, as the author addresses her ongoing battle with both physical and mental illness, including a trial of transcranial magnetic stimulation, a relatively new therapy for people who suffer from treatment-resistant depression. The author’s colloquial narrative style may not suit the linear-narrative crowd, but this isn’t for them. “What we really want,” she writes, “is to know we’re not alone in our terribleness….Human foibles are what make us us, and the art of mortification is what brings us all together.” The material is fresh, but the scaffolding is the same.
Fans will find comfort in Lawson’s dependably winning mix of shameless irreverence, wicked humor, and vulnerability.Pub Date: April 6, 2021
ISBN: 978-1-250-07703-5
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Henry Holt
Review Posted Online: Jan. 26, 2021
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 15, 2021
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