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HARD ASKS MADE EASY

HOW TO GET EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT

A straightforward and often powerful self-help book.

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Consultant Fredricks, author of The Ask: For Business, For Philanthropy, For Everyday Living (2017), aims to show readers how to ask tough questions and receive satisfying answers.

This compact self-help book may be brief, but it’s bursting with hard truths, sage advice, and learned examples. In a forthright introduction, Fredricks promises to aid readers in the process of asking difficult queries of others and turning “those nos and maybes into yeses, yeses, and yeses.” She notes that the power to ask questions is one of the earliest powers that a human being has—think of a child and their candid, unfiltered curiosity. But past unpleasant experiences and the fear of rejection frequently stop adults from asking for things that they believe are “hard,” such as time, respect, money, and even love. In a clear, succinct manner, Fredricks offers advice in a compelling, digestible form, including scenarios from her own life and work, bullet points, tables, and takeaways that summarize each chapter. After taking a quiz to discover what sort of “asker” they are (“The Negotiator,” “The Empathizer,” “The Presenter,” or “The Charmer”), the reader is thrust into a world of confidence and poise—and a world of many rules, which offers a very direct approach. After learning “the three rules of asking” (“Be Prepared, Be Personal, and Be Present”) and “Laura’s Five Laws of Asking” (from “Know exactly what you want, with numbers and dates” to “Plan your next move at the end of the ask”) the reader will emerge with an in-depth understanding of the ins and outs of a big ask. Fredricks excels in approaching her readers with an understanding tone and practical tips that are applicable to a wide range of people’s lives. Whether one is a chief executive, like the author, or a student, an employee or an employer, an introvert or an extrovert, one will come away from the book with ways to tackle problems with the same confidence as a kid asking a question.

A straightforward and often powerful self-help book.

Pub Date: June 13, 2023

ISBN: 9781642257076

Page Count: 160

Publisher: Advantage Media Group

Review Posted Online: May 3, 2023

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BRAVE ENOUGH

These platitudes need perspective; better to buy the books they came from.

A lightweight collection of self-help snippets from the bestselling author.

What makes a quote a quote? Does it have to be quoted by someone other than the original author? Apparently not, if we take Strayed’s collection of truisms as an example. The well-known memoirist (Wild), novelist (Torch), and radio-show host (“Dear Sugar”) pulls lines from her previous pages and delivers them one at a time in this small, gift-sized book. No excerpt exceeds one page in length, and some are only one line long. Strayed doesn’t reference the books she’s drawing from, so the quotes stand without context and are strung together without apparent attention to structure or narrative flow. Thus, we move back and forth from first-person tales from the Pacific Crest Trail to conversational tidbits to meditations on grief. Some are astoundingly simple, such as Strayed’s declaration that “Love is the feeling we have for those we care deeply about and hold in high regard.” Others call on the author’s unique observations—people who regret what they haven’t done, she writes, end up “mingy, addled, shrink-wrapped versions” of themselves—and offer a reward for wading through obvious advice like “Trust your gut.” Other quotes sound familiar—not necessarily because you’ve read Strayed’s other work, but likely due to the influence of other authors on her writing. When she writes about blooming into your own authenticity, for instance, one is immediately reminded of Anaïs Nin: "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” Strayed’s true blossoming happens in her longer works; while this collection might brighten someone’s day—and is sure to sell plenty of copies during the holidays—it’s no substitute for the real thing.

These platitudes need perspective; better to buy the books they came from.

Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2015

ISBN: 978-1-101-946909

Page Count: 160

Publisher: Knopf

Review Posted Online: Aug. 15, 2015

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2015

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YEAR OF YES

HOW TO DANCE IT OUT, STAND IN THE SUN AND BE YOUR OWN PERSON

Rhimes said “yes” to sharing her insights. Following her may not land you on the cover of a magazine, but you’ll be glad you...

The queen of Thursday night TV delivers a sincere and inspiring account of saying yes to life.

Rhimes, the brain behind hits like Grey’s Anatomy and Scandal, is an introvert. She describes herself as a young girl, playing alone in the pantry, making up soap-opera script stories to act out with the canned goods. Speaking in public terrified her; going to events exhausted her. She was always busy, and she didn’t have enough time for her daughters. One Thanksgiving changed it all: when her sister observed that she never said “yes” to anything, Rhimes took it as a challenge. She started, among other things, accepting invitations, facing unpleasant conversations, and playing with her children whenever they asked. The result was a year of challenges and self-discovery that led to a fundamental shift in how she lives her life. Rhimes tells us all about it in the speedy, smart style of her much-loved TV shows. She’s warm, eminently relatable, and funny. We get an idea of what it’s like to be a successful TV writer and producer, to be the ruler of Shondaland, but the focus is squarely on the lessons one can learn from saying yes rather than shying away. Saying no was easy, Rhimes writes. It was comfortable, “a way to disappear.” But after her year, no matter how tempting it is, “I can no longer allow myself to say no. No is no longer in my vocabulary.” The book is a fast read—readers could finish it in the time it takes to watch a full lineup of her Thursday night programing—but it’s not insubstantial. Like a cashmere shawl you pack just in case, Year of Yes is well worth the purse space, and it would make an equally great gift.

Rhimes said “yes” to sharing her insights. Following her may not land you on the cover of a magazine, but you’ll be glad you did. 

Pub Date: Nov. 11, 2015

ISBN: 978-1-4767-7709-2

Page Count: 288

Publisher: Simon & Schuster

Review Posted Online: Oct. 31, 2015

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