An insider’s impassioned, worthwhile look at the impact of the secrets revealed by DNA testing.
A DNA test reveals a surprise about a woman’s parentage.
The title of this blend of memoir and self-help guide is an acronym from the world of genealogy and genetics. A “non-paternity event” describes an individual whose biological father turns out to be someone other than the person listed on the birth certificate. Hay became an NPE when a commercial DNA test revealed that her biological father was her mother’s employer, a family friend she had grown up calling Uncle Tom. (His name, like most in the book, is a pseudonym.) The discovery stunned the author, who began reaching out to her half siblings and reevaluating her childhood memories. The volume moves between Hay’s account of coming to terms with a new understanding of herself and her somewhat dysfunctional family and a broader look at unexpected paternity and how people can and should respond to it. The author shares anecdotes from other NPEs that offer a variety of perspectives as well as a glance at the historical construction of paternity and legitimacy. The book is full of advice for NPEs (do reach out to newly discovered relatives in writing rather than showing up on their doorsteps; avoid paying for expensive genealogy services while emotions are high) and their friends and families. The text is acronym-heavy—“I wrote this to convey support and offer help to an NPE regarding her BM (her BCF had passed away before her discovery)”—and could have used some editorial polishing. Still, Hay’s knowledge and enthusiasm for her subject are evident. The author is strongest in telling the story of her family and exploring the intense emotions triggered by her discovery. She describes her feelings in detail and assesses what was most helpful as she hunted for answers to her questions of identity and belonging. While other books take a more comprehensive approach to investigating commercial DNA testing and the growing number of paternity surprises, Hay’s work is best suited to serving as a guide to NPEs in search of an experienced voice of reassurance and support as they adapt to their new realities.
An insider’s impassioned, worthwhile look at the impact of the secrets revealed by DNA testing.Pub Date: Oct. 15, 2021
ISBN: 978-1-64718-608-1
Page Count: 266
Publisher: Booklocker.com
Review Posted Online: June 22, 2022
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
It’s not Shakespeare, not by a long shot. But at least it’s not James Franco.
A noted actor turns to verse: “Poems are a Saturday in the middle of the week.”
McConaughey, author of the gracefully written memoir Greenlights, has been writing poems since his teens, closing with one “written in an Australian bathtub” that reads just as a poem by an 18-year-old (Rimbaud excepted) should read: “Ignorant minds of the fortunate man / Blind of the fate shaping every land.” McConaughey is fearless in his commitment to the rhyme, no matter how slight the result (“Oops, took a quick peek at the sky before I got my glasses, / now I can’t see shit, sure hope this passes”). And, sad to say, the slight is what is most on display throughout, punctuated by some odd koanlike aperçus: “Eating all we can / at the all-we-can-eat buffet, / gives us a 3.8 education / and a 4.2 GPA.” “Never give up your right to do the next right thing. This is how we find our way home.” “Memory never forgets. Even though we do.” The prayer portion of the program is deeply felt, but it’s just as sentimental; only when he writes of life-changing events—a court appearance to file a restraining order against a stalker, his decision to quit smoking weed—do we catch a glimpse of the effortlessly fluent, effortlessly charming McConaughey as exemplified by the David Wooderson (“alright, alright, alright”) of Dazed and Confused. The rest is mostly a soufflé in verse. McConaughey’s heart is very clearly in the right place, but on the whole the book suggests an old saw: Don’t give up your day job.
It’s not Shakespeare, not by a long shot. But at least it’s not James Franco.Pub Date: Sept. 16, 2025
ISBN: 9781984862105
Page Count: 208
Publisher: Crown
Review Posted Online: Aug. 15, 2025
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 15, 2025
BOOK REVIEW
BOOK REVIEW
SEEN & HEARD
SEEN & HEARD
A sweet final word from an actor who leaves a legacy of compassion and kindness.
The late actor offers a gentle guide for living with more purpose, love, and joy.
Mixing poetry, prescriptive challenges, and elements of memoir, Heche (1969-2022) delivers a narrative that is more encouraging workbook than life story. The author wants to share what she has discovered over the course of a life filled with abuse, advocacy, and uncanny turning points. Her greatest discovery? Love. “Open yourself up to love and transform kindness from a feeling you extend to those around you to actions that you perform for them,” she writes. “Only by caring can we open ourselves up to the universe, and only by opening up to the universe can we fully experience all the wonders that it holds, the greatest of which is love.” Throughout the occasionally overwrought text, Heche is heavy on the concept of care. She wants us to experience joy as she does, and she provides a road map for how to get there. Instead of slinking away from Hollywood and the ridicule that she endured there, Heche found the good and hung on, with Alec Baldwin and Harrison Ford starring as particularly shining knights in her story. Some readers may dismiss this material as vapid Hollywood stuff, but Heche’s perspective is an empathetic blend of Buddhism (minimize suffering), dialectical behavioral therapy (tolerating distress), Christianity (do unto others), and pre-Socratic philosophy (sufficient reason). “You’re not out to change the whole world, but to increase the levels of love and kindness in the world, drop by drop,” she writes. “Over time, these actions wear away the coldness, hate, and indifference around us as surely as water slowly wearing away stone.” Readers grieving her loss will take solace knowing that she lived her love-filled life on her own terms. Heche’s business and podcast partner, Heather Duffy, writes the epilogue, closing the book on a life well lived.
A sweet final word from an actor who leaves a legacy of compassion and kindness.Pub Date: Jan. 24, 2023
ISBN: 9781627783316
Page Count: 176
Publisher: Viva Editions
Review Posted Online: Feb. 6, 2023
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2023
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