bookshelf

I’M SAYING NO!

Name: I’M SAYING NO!
Author: Beverly Engel
ISBN: 978-1-63152-525-4

by Beverly Engel ‧ RELEASE DATE: April 2, 2019

A useful guide to combating sexual violence and raising women’s self-esteem.

bookshelf

A self-help book about challenging rape culture, aimed primarily at women who’ve faced sexual assault or harassment in the past.

Engel’s (It Wasn’t Your Fault, 2015, etc.) latest self-help book again draws on her work as a psychotherapist. Here, she strives to teach women how to say “no,” particularly when faced with possible sexual misconduct or abuse. Each chapter includes exercises to help readers to better comprehend their behaviors and emotions, and to practice saying “no” in a variety of contexts. Real-life anecdotes from Engel’s clients add color and provide specific examples, and appendices provide recommendations for further reading and information on women’s rights organizations. Engel’s tone is chatty and empowering as she reminds victims that they can move past an assault, and as she encourages all women to become comfortable at expressing anger. She effectively acknowledges that prevention should not be a victim’s responsibility; that said, the tone of her cautioning sometimes borders on finger-wagging (“Fraternity parties and parties made up of football players are particularly dangerous places for young women”; “Never be alone in a room with a man you don’t know”). However, the book does a good job of presenting strategies to develop self-awareness, recognize potential threats, and get out of problematic situations. Engel’s approach won’t appeal to everyone; her characterization of the penis as a weapon, for instance, may raise eyebrows, and the book’s tendency to generalize about entire cultures (“The Balinese people are noted for several things”; “Latinas often accept their situations with resignation”) seems tone-deaf. On the whole, though, this is a collection of well-organized, practical information for its target readership.

A useful guide to combating sexual violence and raising women’s self-esteem.

Pub Date: April 2, 2019

ISBN: 978-1-63152-525-4

Page Count: 256

Publisher: She Writes Press

Review Posted Online: Jan. 31, 2019

Review Program: Kirkus Indie

Categories:

FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS | SELF-HELP

bookshelf

THE LAWS OF HUMAN NATURE

by Robert Greene ‧ RELEASE DATE: Oct. 23, 2018

The Stoics did much better with the much shorter Enchiridion.

bookshelf

A follow-on to the author’s garbled but popular 48 Laws of Power, promising that readers will learn how to win friends and influence people, to say nothing of outfoxing all those “toxic types” out in the world.

Greene (Mastery, 2012, etc.) begins with a big sell, averring that his book “is designed to immerse you in all aspects of human behavior and illuminate its root causes.” To gauge by this fat compendium, human behavior is mostly rotten, a presumption that fits with the author’s neo-Machiavellian program of self-validation and eventual strategic supremacy. The author works to formula: First, state a “law,” such as “confront your dark side” or “know your limits,” the latter of which seems pale compared to the Delphic oracle’s “nothing in excess.” Next, elaborate on that law with what might seem to be as plain as day: “Losing contact with reality, we make irrational decisions. That is why our success often does not last.” One imagines there might be other reasons for the evanescence of glory, but there you go. Finally, spin out a long tutelary yarn, seemingly the longer the better, to shore up the truism—in this case, the cometary rise and fall of one-time Disney CEO Michael Eisner, with the warning, “his fate could easily be yours, albeit most likely on a smaller scale,” which ranks right up there with the fortuneteller’s “I sense that someone you know has died" in orders of probability. It’s enough to inspire a new law: Beware of those who spend too much time telling you what you already know, even when it’s dressed up in fresh-sounding terms. “Continually mix the visceral with the analytic” is the language of a consultant’s report, more important-sounding than “go with your gut but use your head, too.”

The Stoics did much better with the much shorter Enchiridion.

Pub Date: Oct. 23, 2018

ISBN: 978-0-525-42814-5

Page Count: 580

Publisher: Viking

Review Posted Online: July 30, 2018

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Aug. 15, 2018

Categories:

PSYCHOLOGY | SELF-HELP

- BOOK REVIEW
MASTERY
by Robert Greene

- BOOK REVIEW
THE 48 LAWS OF POWER
by Robert Greene

bookshelf

MASTERY

by Robert Greene ‧ RELEASE DATE: Nov. 13, 2012

Readers unfamiliar with the anecdotal material Greene presents may find interesting avenues to pursue, but they should...

bookshelf

Greene (The 33 Strategies of War, 2007, etc.) believes that genius can be learned if we pay attention and reject social conformity.

The author suggests that our emergence as a species with stereoscopic, frontal vision and sophisticated hand-eye coordination gave us an advantage over earlier humans and primates because it allowed us to contemplate a situation and ponder alternatives for action. This, along with the advantages conferred by mirror neurons, which allow us to intuit what others may be thinking, contributed to our ability to learn, pass on inventions to future generations and improve our problem-solving ability. Throughout most of human history, we were hunter-gatherers, and our brains are engineered accordingly. The author has a jaundiced view of our modern technological society, which, he writes, encourages quick, rash judgments. We fail to spend the time needed to develop thorough mastery of a subject. Greene writes that every human is “born unique,” with specific potential that we can develop if we listen to our inner voice. He offers many interesting but tendentious examples to illustrate his theory, including Einstein, Darwin, Mozart and Temple Grandin. In the case of Darwin, Greene ignores the formative intellectual influences that shaped his thought, including the discovery of geological evolution with which he was familiar before his famous voyage. The author uses Grandin's struggle to overcome autistic social handicaps as a model for the necessity for everyone to create a deceptive social mask.

Readers unfamiliar with the anecdotal material Greene presents may find interesting avenues to pursue, but they should beware of the author's quirky, sometimes misleading brush-stroke characterizations.