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THE SUBVERSIVE FAMILY

AN ALTERNATIVE HISTORY OF LOVE AND MARRIAGE

From TLS editor Mount (The Selkirk Strip, 1988, etc.): a controversial history of love and marriage in Europe that reveals how threatening private relationships have been to both church and state—and how those institutions have unsuccessfully attempted to suppress private relationships by perpetuating myths about how modern or unstable or unnatural such relationships are. The family, Mount contends, is the enemy of hierarchies and revolutionaries—including, he says, figures such as Plato, Jesus, Marx, Lenin, Mao, and Hitler. According to Mount, all of these men attempted to subvert the family by setting up surrogates such as communes, kibbutzim, monasteries, or convents—and then, defeated by the powerful human urge to pair up, by establishing strict if unenforceable rules to govern private life. Such anti-nuclear- family movements—assisted, Mount claims, by artists, whose creativity is threatened by domestic life—created such myths as the ``indifferent mother,'' which posits that maternal affection, like the nuclear family, divorce, and romantic love itself, is a modern, unsuccessful invention as well as a poor substitute for the extended family and arranged marriages. Mount draws on evidence from social scientists, Chaucer, Jane Austen, Henry VIII, and ``pub'' talk to offer a realist's assessment of ``popular'' marriage, showing that private coupling, however fallible—based as it is on affection and independence—is how people always choose to live when they have a choice. Mount's focus is exclusively European here, but his study is in the iconoclastic spirit of Stephanie Coontz's The Way We Never Were (p. 1031), which decodes and destroys American myths of domesticity. Coinciding with an election year that's focused on these myths, Mount's argument acquires a particularly ironic twist- -for one way demagogues control the family, he shows, is to claim they are in favor of it.

Pub Date: Dec. 14, 1992

ISBN: 0-02-921992-2

Page Count: 300

Publisher: Free Press

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Oct. 15, 1992

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THE ESCAPE ARTIST

A vivid sequel that strains credulity.

Fremont (After Long Silence, 1999) continues—and alters—her story of how memories of the Holocaust affected her family.

At the age of 44, the author learned that her father had disowned her, declaring her “predeceased”—or dead in his eyes—in his will. It was his final insult: Her parents had stopped speaking to her after she’d published After Long Silence, which exposed them as Jewish Holocaust survivors who had posed as Catholics in Europe and America in order to hide multilayered secrets. Here, Fremont delves further into her tortured family dynamics and shows how the rift developed. One thread centers on her life after her harrowing childhood: her education at Wellesley and Boston University, the loss of her virginity to a college boyfriend before accepting her lesbianism, her stint with the Peace Corps in Lesotho, and her decades of work as a lawyer in Boston. Another strand involves her fraught relationship with her sister, Lara, and how their difficulties relate to their father, a doctor embittered after years in the Siberian gulag; and their mother, deeply enmeshed with her own sister, Zosia, who had married an Italian count and stayed in Rome to raise a child. Fremont tells these stories with novelistic flair, ending with a surprising theory about why her parents hid their Judaism. Yet she often appears insensitive to the serious problems she says Lara once faced, including suicidal depression. “The whole point of suicide, I thought, was to succeed at it,” she writes. “My sister’s completion rate was pathetic.” Key facts also differ from those in her earlier work. After Long Silence says, for example, that the author grew up “in a small city in the Midwest” while she writes here that she grew up in “upstate New York,” changes Fremont says she made for “consistency” in the new book but that muddy its narrative waters. The discrepancies may not bother readers seeking psychological insights rather than factual accuracy, but others will wonder if this book should have been labeled a fictionalized autobiography rather than a memoir.

A vivid sequel that strains credulity.

Pub Date: Feb. 11, 2020

ISBN: 978-1-982113-60-5

Page Count: 352

Publisher: Gallery Books/Simon & Schuster

Review Posted Online: Oct. 20, 2019

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Nov. 15, 2019

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AN INVISIBLE THREAD

THE TRUE STORY OF AN 11-YEAR-OLD PANHANDLER, A BUSY SALES EXECUTIVE, AND AN UNLIKELY MEETING WITH DESTINY

A straightforward tale of kindness and paying it forward in 1980s New York.

When advertising executive Schroff answered a child’s request for spare change by inviting him for lunch, she did not expect the encounter to grow into a friendship that would endure into his adulthood. The author recounts how she and Maurice, a promising boy from a drug-addicted family, learned to trust each other. Schroff acknowledges risks—including the possibility of her actions being misconstrued and the tension of crossing socio-economic divides—but does not dwell on the complexities of homelessness or the philosophical problems of altruism. She does not question whether public recognition is beneficial, or whether it is sufficient for the recipient to realize the extent of what has been done. With the assistance of People human-interest writer Tresniowski (Tiger Virtues, 2005, etc.), Schroff adheres to a personal narrative that traces her troubled relationship with her father, her meetings with Maurice and his background, all while avoiding direct parallels, noting that their childhoods differed in severity even if they shared similar emotional voids. With feel-good dramatizations, the story seldom transcends the message that reaching out makes a difference. It is framed in simple terms, from attributing the first meeting to “two people with complicated pasts and fragile dreams” that were “somehow meant to be friends” to the conclusion that love is a driving force. Admirably, Schroff notes that she did not seek a role as a “substitute parent,” and she does not judge Maurice’s mother for her lifestyle. That both main figures experience a few setbacks yet eventually survive is never in question; the story fittingly concludes with an epilogue by Maurice. For readers seeking an uplifting reminder that small gestures matter.

 

Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2011

ISBN: 978-1-4516-4251-3

Page Count: 288

Publisher: Howard Books/Simon & Schuster

Review Posted Online: July 26, 2011

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2011

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