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The Co-Parents' Handbook

A solid, positive guide for families experiencing the potentially devastating tribulations of divorce.

Awards & Accolades

Our Verdict

  • Our Verdict
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Clinical nurse specialist Bonnell joins forces with mental health counselor Little to produce a dense but engaging divorce manual that focuses on families with children.

In this guide, the authors forgo tirades against exes and instead present a road map so that “co-parents” undergoing a divorce can turn a very difficult transition for kids into one that “expands their sense of family.” The book generously employs bullet points, italics, boldface text, and text boxes throughout 11 chapters that provide a wealth of information for parents in the divorce trenches. It concludes with a helpful, succinct rundown of “Highlights in Review.” A single worksheet (“Your Co-Parenting Goals”) focuses readers’ attention on “what’s really important”; in it, parents are encouraged to “keep your most preciously held values front-and-center, even when life is tumultuous and stressful.” The intentionally inclusive text (“Our goal is to support family—not define family”) incorporates voices from a wide range of family configurations. One section offers ideas for difficult relationships but notes that extremely challenging issues, such as addiction or incarceration, are “beyond the scope of this book” and suggests options, such as “Child specialists, parenting coaches, counselors, or family therapists.”  Topics include the practical (“Online Family Calendars”), the emotional (“What About Birthdays?”), and the intense (“Introducing new Romantic Partners”). The book is chock full of helpful hints and useful scripts, and motivated readers will find much support to help them here. Some readers, though, may be overwhelmed and discouraged by the sheer amount of text. Overall, however, Bonnell and Little ably provide assurance that “what divorce breaks apart—strong co-parenting rebuilds.”

A solid, positive guide for families experiencing the potentially devastating tribulations of divorce. 

Pub Date: July 25, 2014

ISBN: 978-1-5043-3318-4

Page Count: 254

Publisher: BalboaPress

Review Posted Online: Oct. 14, 2015

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THE ESCAPE ARTIST

A vivid sequel that strains credulity.

Fremont (After Long Silence, 1999) continues—and alters—her story of how memories of the Holocaust affected her family.

At the age of 44, the author learned that her father had disowned her, declaring her “predeceased”—or dead in his eyes—in his will. It was his final insult: Her parents had stopped speaking to her after she’d published After Long Silence, which exposed them as Jewish Holocaust survivors who had posed as Catholics in Europe and America in order to hide multilayered secrets. Here, Fremont delves further into her tortured family dynamics and shows how the rift developed. One thread centers on her life after her harrowing childhood: her education at Wellesley and Boston University, the loss of her virginity to a college boyfriend before accepting her lesbianism, her stint with the Peace Corps in Lesotho, and her decades of work as a lawyer in Boston. Another strand involves her fraught relationship with her sister, Lara, and how their difficulties relate to their father, a doctor embittered after years in the Siberian gulag; and their mother, deeply enmeshed with her own sister, Zosia, who had married an Italian count and stayed in Rome to raise a child. Fremont tells these stories with novelistic flair, ending with a surprising theory about why her parents hid their Judaism. Yet she often appears insensitive to the serious problems she says Lara once faced, including suicidal depression. “The whole point of suicide, I thought, was to succeed at it,” she writes. “My sister’s completion rate was pathetic.” Key facts also differ from those in her earlier work. After Long Silence says, for example, that the author grew up “in a small city in the Midwest” while she writes here that she grew up in “upstate New York,” changes Fremont says she made for “consistency” in the new book but that muddy its narrative waters. The discrepancies may not bother readers seeking psychological insights rather than factual accuracy, but others will wonder if this book should have been labeled a fictionalized autobiography rather than a memoir.

A vivid sequel that strains credulity.

Pub Date: Feb. 11, 2020

ISBN: 978-1-982113-60-5

Page Count: 352

Publisher: Gallery Books/Simon & Schuster

Review Posted Online: Oct. 20, 2019

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Nov. 15, 2019

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STRONG MOTHERS, STRONG SONS

LESSONS MOTHERS NEED TO RAISE EXTRAORDINARY MEN

Solid, practical advice for women on how to properly nurture their sons.

How women can raise boys to become good men.

More than ever, women are under pressure to be "everything to everyone," writes Meeker (The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers: Reclaiming Our Passion, Purpose, and Sanity, 2010, etc.), as "working women feel that they must perform equally well both in the office and in caring for their home, husband, and children." The dynamics of raising boys is especially difficult for women due to the gender difference and the fact that women tend to be nurturing and helpful while allowing their sons to evolve into men in a constantly shifting masculine paradigm. Through research and interviews from her own practice, Meeker gives women the necessary tools to understand that perfection is not a realistic goal but that doing the best one can will ensure good results. Equally useful to single mothers and women with husbands is the advice that sons need to know they are loved from a very young age, as this builds a foundation of confidence in a child, a base that allows a boy to gradually move away from his mother as he interacts with male peers and elders. A boy's home life must be solid: a safe haven to return to regardless of his age, a place where his thoughts and feelings are respected and where he can express his hopes and dreams without fear of judgment. Meeker recommends introducing boys to religion, prayer and the unconditional love that comes from having a strong faith to boost self-confidence. She also skillfully navigates the world of sex—from a boy's first body awareness to the powerful effects of pornography and sexual messages embedded in social media, video games and news media, to his interactions in the world of girls and women. A mother's imprint on her son is powerful right from birth and remains so throughout her son's life. Meeker's advice gives women the tools to navigate these often rocky waters with confidence.

Solid, practical advice for women on how to properly nurture their sons.

Pub Date: April 8, 2014

ISBN: 978-0-345-51809-5

Page Count: 368

Publisher: Ballantine

Review Posted Online: Feb. 18, 2014

Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2014

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