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WATER LESSONS

Indelible poetry that turns on every light in the house—and uncovers enlightenment in corners.

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In this intimate collection, a poet explores myriad grief-related topics, from her childhood memories of systemic racism to her complex relationship with her mother, who grappled with alcoholism.

Imagery related to Dordal’s childhood home (and domiciles in general) is prevalent throughout the 29 poems, making a fitting metaphor to describe the reading experience, which is similar to walking through an old familiar house, turning on the lights in each room, and letting the memories wash over you. A line from Dordal’s “Ars Poetica” embraces the symbolism of home and speaks volumes about her life growing up with a parent who kept secrets: “So many rooms were closed off before we knew they were there." Featuring comparable household imagery, the beginning lines of “My Mother Is a Peaceful Ghost” are both nostalgic and heart-rending, as the poet remembers her mother and her struggles with alcoholism: “In my dreams my mother keeps walking out of the kitchen singing / You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. / She never sings past the first verse. / Last night, I dreamed I was back at the house—every light on when I arrived. My mother, forgetting / she was dead, smiled, said she was fine, everything / was fine.” In “My Mother, Arriving,” Dordal’s effort to come to terms with her loved one’s death—even after her own father had moved on and gotten remarried—is exemplified as she watches an old home movie on a projector of her mother walking toward the family home: “My mother, arriving. My mother, leaving. / My mother, not going away.” In “My Mother Speaks to Me,” the poet inadvertently describes this collection perfectly: “A friend tells me I write / ‘mother poems’ / not poems about love / or death, but I don’t know / the difference.”

The poems about Dordal’s revelations regarding structural racism are also highlights. In “Primer,” for example, the poet, as a young girl with a “white imagination,” reads Pippi Longstocking stories and doesn’t understand the wrongness of Pippi’s father being “king of the Negroes” or the girl painting her face black. Even more profoundly moving is “Housekeeper,” in which Dordal can’t remember the last name of a housekeeper who not only cleaned the house and cooked for the poet’s clan, but attended family graduations and weddings as well: “I saw her. / I didn’t see her.” Yet arguably the most unforgettable selection is “Welcome,” a powerhouse of a poem that will resonate with the audience long after the reading experience is over. In the piece, Dordal is staying in a hotel room and listening to the welcome channel on the television. During the historic 2017 Women’s March in Washington, D.C. (“This Pussy Fights Back. No Ban, No Wall”), where hundreds of thousands were protesting in the streets, a pretty woman on the hotel’s channel—who reminded the poet of her mother—warned to keep the doors and windows locked and to never invite strangers into the room. The similarity to Dordal’s mother, combined with the political chaos outside the hotel, triggered very specific and disturbing memories: “Be alert, the woman says. As alert / as you are at home. Nice story, she said.”

Indelible poetry that turns on every light in the house—and uncovers enlightenment in corners.

Pub Date: April 1, 2022

ISBN: 978-1-62557-031-4

Page Count: 70

Publisher: Black Lawrence Press

Review Posted Online: Jan. 14, 2022

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I'M GLAD MY MOM DIED

The heartbreaking story of an emotionally battered child delivered with captivating candor and grace.

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The former iCarly star reflects on her difficult childhood.

In her debut memoir, titled after her 2020 one-woman show, singer and actor McCurdy (b. 1992) reveals the raw details of what she describes as years of emotional abuse at the hands of her demanding, emotionally unstable stage mom, Debra. Born in Los Angeles, the author, along with three older brothers, grew up in a home controlled by her mother. When McCurdy was 3, her mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. Though she initially survived, the disease’s recurrence would ultimately take her life when the author was 21. McCurdy candidly reconstructs those in-between years, showing how “my mom emotionally, mentally, and physically abused me in ways that will forever impact me.” Insistent on molding her only daughter into “Mommy’s little actress,” Debra shuffled her to auditions beginning at age 6. As she matured and starting booking acting gigs, McCurdy remained “desperate to impress Mom,” while Debra became increasingly obsessive about her daughter’s physical appearance. She tinted her daughter’s eyelashes, whitened her teeth, enforced a tightly monitored regimen of “calorie restriction,” and performed regular genital exams on her as a teenager. Eventually, the author grew understandably resentful and tried to distance herself from her mother. As a young celebrity, however, McCurdy became vulnerable to eating disorders, alcohol addiction, self-loathing, and unstable relationships. Throughout the book, she honestly portrays Debra’s cruel perfectionist personality and abusive behavior patterns, showing a woman who could get enraged by everything from crooked eyeliner to spilled milk. At the same time, McCurdy exhibits compassion for her deeply flawed mother. Late in the book, she shares a crushing secret her father revealed to her as an adult. While McCurdy didn’t emerge from her childhood unscathed, she’s managed to spin her harrowing experience into a sold-out stage act and achieve a form of catharsis that puts her mind, body, and acting career at peace.

The heartbreaking story of an emotionally battered child delivered with captivating candor and grace.

Pub Date: Aug. 9, 2022

ISBN: 978-1-982185-82-4

Page Count: 320

Publisher: Simon & Schuster

Review Posted Online: May 30, 2022

Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 1, 2022

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BEYOND THE GENDER BINARY

From the Pocket Change Collective series

A fierce, penetrating, and empowering call for change.

Artist and activist Vaid-Menon demonstrates how the normativity of the gender binary represses creativity and inflicts physical and emotional violence.

The author, whose parents emigrated from India, writes about how enforcement of the gender binary begins before birth and affects people in all stages of life, with people of color being especially vulnerable due to Western conceptions of gender as binary. Gender assignments create a narrative for how a person should behave, what they are allowed to like or wear, and how they express themself. Punishment of nonconformity leads to an inseparable link between gender and shame. Vaid-Menon challenges familiar arguments against gender nonconformity, breaking them down into four categories—dismissal, inconvenience, biology, and the slippery slope (fear of the consequences of acceptance). Headers in bold font create an accessible navigation experience from one analysis to the next. The prose maintains a conversational tone that feels as intimate and vulnerable as talking with a best friend. At the same time, the author's turns of phrase in moments of deep insight ring with precision and poetry. In one reflection, they write, “the most lethal part of the human body is not the fist; it is the eye. What people see and how people see it has everything to do with power.” While this short essay speaks honestly of pain and injustice, it concludes with encouragement and an invitation into a future that celebrates transformation.

A fierce, penetrating, and empowering call for change. (writing prompt) (Nonfiction. 14-adult)

Pub Date: June 2, 2020

ISBN: 978-0-593-09465-5

Page Count: 64

Publisher: Penguin Workshop

Review Posted Online: March 14, 2020

Kirkus Reviews Issue: April 1, 2020

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