A constructive guide to upbeat, supportive and satisfying parenting.
Family psychologist McKee tenders a concise road map to building a positive, rich bond with one’s child.
Building a constructive, enduring relationship with a child takes time, self-awareness and an appreciation of a young one’s cognitive, emotional and social needs, says McKee at the start of this bracingly direct guide to fashioning that relationship. The author aims for clarity with his audience, employing a tone of professionalism—he taps into much recent research on childhood development—that is bolstered by a measure of warmth and understanding: “You can nurture the development of a healthy emotional relationship with your child by surrounding him/her with an atmosphere of acceptance and respect underscored with consistency and reliability.” McKee doesn’t leave such a grand statement dangling, but explains directly how to verbally and physically engage with your infant, nurturing a sense of play and pleasure. The author also suggests when to relax; parents shouldn’t concern themselves with timetables, but “[f]ocus instead on inviting and encouraging your child to continue to develop his/her skills.” He urges parents to provide and participate in play activities to develop motor skills, with an eye toward mutual pleasure, which will strengthen the relationship. McKee cautions not to automatically bring one’s parents’ style of child-rearing to his or her relationship with a child, due to the differences in personality and temperament. He makes plain how consistency, reliability and predictability—follow-through on rules—engender trust and security, and how positive attitudes impact self-esteem and self-confidence. The author firmly believes that discipline is achieved not through punishment—which should be a short-term response—but through an “internal mastery” of behavior that responds more to rewards than penalization. What gives this manual its tender humanity is the creation and subsequent nurturing of an atmosphere of active encouragement and acceptance that will bring gratification and growth to all parties.
A constructive guide to upbeat, supportive and satisfying parenting.Pub Date: April 28, 2011
ISBN: 978-1456557911
Page Count: 178
Publisher: CreateSpace
Review Posted Online: June 3, 2011
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
An intriguing approach to identifying and relating to one’s emotions.
An analysis of our emotions and the skills required to understand them.
We all have emotions, but how many of us have the vocabulary to accurately describe our experiences or to understand how our emotions affect the way we act? In this guide to help readers with their emotions, Brackett, the founding director of Yale University’s Center for Emotional Intelligence, presents a five-step method he calls R.U.L.E.R.: We need to recognize our emotions, understand what has caused them, be able to label them with precise terms and descriptions, know how to safely and effectively express them, and be able to regulate them in productive ways. The author walks readers through each step and provides an intriguing tool to use to help identify a specific emotion. Brackett introduces a four-square grid called a Mood Meter, which allows one to define where an emotion falls based on pleasantness and energy. He also uses four colors for each quadrant: yellow for high pleasantness and high energy, red for low pleasantness and high energy, green for high pleasantness and low energy, and blue for low pleasantness and low energy. The idea is to identify where an emotion lies in this grid in order to put the R.U.L.E.R. method to good use. The author’s research is wide-ranging, and his interweaving of his personal story with the data helps make the book less academic and more accessible to general readers. It’s particularly useful for parents and teachers who want to help children learn to handle difficult emotions so that they can thrive rather than be overwhelmed by them. The author’s system will also find use in the workplace. “Emotions are the most powerful force inside the workplace—as they are in every human endeavor,” writes Brackett. “They influence everything from leadership effectiveness to building and maintaining complex relationships, from innovation to customer relations.”
An intriguing approach to identifying and relating to one’s emotions.Pub Date: Sept. 3, 2019
ISBN: 978-1-250-21284-9
Page Count: 320
Publisher: Celadon Books
Review Posted Online: June 22, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 15, 2019
A highly readable account of how solid research and personal testing of self-help techniques saved a couple's marriage after...
Self-help advice and personal reflections on avoiding spousal fights while raising children.
Before her daughter was born, bestselling author Dunn (Why Is My Mother Getting a Tattoo?: And Other Questions I Wish I Never Had to Ask, 2009, etc.) enjoyed steady work and a happy marriage. However, once she became a mother, there never seemed to be enough time, sleep, and especially help from her husband. Little irritations became monumental obstacles between them, which led to major battles. Consequently, they turned to expensive couples' therapy to help them regain some peace in life. In a combination of memoir and advice that can be found in most couples' therapy self-help books, Dunn provides an inside look at her own vexing issues and the solutions she and her husband used to prevent them from appearing in divorce court. They struggled with age-old battles fought between men and women—e.g., frequency of sex, who does more housework, who should get up with the child in the middle of the night, why women need to have a clean house, why men need more alone time, and many more. What Dunn learned via therapy, talks with other parents, and research was that there is no perfect solution to the many dynamics that surface once couples become parents. But by using time-tested techniques, she and her husband learned to listen, show empathy, and adjust so that their former status as a happy couple could safely and peacefully morph into a happy family. Readers familiar with Dunn's honest and humorous writing will appreciate the behind-the-scenes look at her own semi-messy family life, and those who need guidance through the rough spots can glean advice while being entertained—all without spending lots of money on couples’ therapy.
A highly readable account of how solid research and personal testing of self-help techniques saved a couple's marriage after the birth of their child.Pub Date: March 21, 2017
ISBN: 978-0-316-26710-6
Page Count: 272
Publisher: Little, Brown
Review Posted Online: Jan. 17, 2017
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 1, 2017
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