A constructive guide to upbeat, supportive and satisfying parenting.
Family psychologist McKee tenders a concise road map to building a positive, rich bond with one’s child.
Building a constructive, enduring relationship with a child takes time, self-awareness and an appreciation of a young one’s cognitive, emotional and social needs, says McKee at the start of this bracingly direct guide to fashioning that relationship. The author aims for clarity with his audience, employing a tone of professionalism—he taps into much recent research on childhood development—that is bolstered by a measure of warmth and understanding: “You can nurture the development of a healthy emotional relationship with your child by surrounding him/her with an atmosphere of acceptance and respect underscored with consistency and reliability.” McKee doesn’t leave such a grand statement dangling, but explains directly how to verbally and physically engage with your infant, nurturing a sense of play and pleasure. The author also suggests when to relax; parents shouldn’t concern themselves with timetables, but “[f]ocus instead on inviting and encouraging your child to continue to develop his/her skills.” He urges parents to provide and participate in play activities to develop motor skills, with an eye toward mutual pleasure, which will strengthen the relationship. McKee cautions not to automatically bring one’s parents’ style of child-rearing to his or her relationship with a child, due to the differences in personality and temperament. He makes plain how consistency, reliability and predictability—follow-through on rules—engender trust and security, and how positive attitudes impact self-esteem and self-confidence. The author firmly believes that discipline is achieved not through punishment—which should be a short-term response—but through an “internal mastery” of behavior that responds more to rewards than penalization. What gives this manual its tender humanity is the creation and subsequent nurturing of an atmosphere of active encouragement and acceptance that will bring gratification and growth to all parties.
A constructive guide to upbeat, supportive and satisfying parenting.Pub Date: April 28, 2011
ISBN: 978-1456557911
Page Count: 178
Publisher: CreateSpace
Review Posted Online: June 3, 2011
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A vivid sequel that strains credulity.
Fremont (After Long Silence, 1999) continues—and alters—her story of how memories of the Holocaust affected her family.
At the age of 44, the author learned that her father had disowned her, declaring her “predeceased”—or dead in his eyes—in his will. It was his final insult: Her parents had stopped speaking to her after she’d published After Long Silence, which exposed them as Jewish Holocaust survivors who had posed as Catholics in Europe and America in order to hide multilayered secrets. Here, Fremont delves further into her tortured family dynamics and shows how the rift developed. One thread centers on her life after her harrowing childhood: her education at Wellesley and Boston University, the loss of her virginity to a college boyfriend before accepting her lesbianism, her stint with the Peace Corps in Lesotho, and her decades of work as a lawyer in Boston. Another strand involves her fraught relationship with her sister, Lara, and how their difficulties relate to their father, a doctor embittered after years in the Siberian gulag; and their mother, deeply enmeshed with her own sister, Zosia, who had married an Italian count and stayed in Rome to raise a child. Fremont tells these stories with novelistic flair, ending with a surprising theory about why her parents hid their Judaism. Yet she often appears insensitive to the serious problems she says Lara once faced, including suicidal depression. “The whole point of suicide, I thought, was to succeed at it,” she writes. “My sister’s completion rate was pathetic.” Key facts also differ from those in her earlier work. After Long Silence says, for example, that the author grew up “in a small city in the Midwest” while she writes here that she grew up in “upstate New York,” changes Fremont says she made for “consistency” in the new book but that muddy its narrative waters. The discrepancies may not bother readers seeking psychological insights rather than factual accuracy, but others will wonder if this book should have been labeled a fictionalized autobiography rather than a memoir.
A vivid sequel that strains credulity.Pub Date: Feb. 11, 2020
ISBN: 978-1-982113-60-5
Page Count: 352
Publisher: Gallery Books/Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: Oct. 20, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Nov. 15, 2019
BOOK REVIEW
A straightforward tale of kindness and paying it forward in 1980s New York.
When advertising executive Schroff answered a child’s request for spare change by inviting him for lunch, she did not expect the encounter to grow into a friendship that would endure into his adulthood. The author recounts how she and Maurice, a promising boy from a drug-addicted family, learned to trust each other. Schroff acknowledges risks—including the possibility of her actions being misconstrued and the tension of crossing socio-economic divides—but does not dwell on the complexities of homelessness or the philosophical problems of altruism. She does not question whether public recognition is beneficial, or whether it is sufficient for the recipient to realize the extent of what has been done. With the assistance of People human-interest writer Tresniowski (Tiger Virtues, 2005, etc.), Schroff adheres to a personal narrative that traces her troubled relationship with her father, her meetings with Maurice and his background, all while avoiding direct parallels, noting that their childhoods differed in severity even if they shared similar emotional voids. With feel-good dramatizations, the story seldom transcends the message that reaching out makes a difference. It is framed in simple terms, from attributing the first meeting to “two people with complicated pasts and fragile dreams” that were “somehow meant to be friends” to the conclusion that love is a driving force. Admirably, Schroff notes that she did not seek a role as a “substitute parent,” and she does not judge Maurice’s mother for her lifestyle. That both main figures experience a few setbacks yet eventually survive is never in question; the story fittingly concludes with an epilogue by Maurice. For readers seeking an uplifting reminder that small gestures matter.
Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2011
ISBN: 978-1-4516-4251-3
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Howard Books/Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: July 26, 2011
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2011
BOOK REVIEW
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