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HELLO DARLING, ARE YOU WORKING?

Candide in modern drag: British actor Everett's first novel retails the naughty adventures of a pill-popping, omnisexual naif as he cruises a jet-set world in which everything, especially him, is for sale. Still smarting from his childhood discovery of the male member that will prevent him from becoming a Great Actress, and warmed by his fonder memories of his early days as a precocious male prostitute, onetime soap-opera star Rhys Waveral is living on, and living it up, in a suite at the Hotel Leicester in Paris—until his father, Brigadier Dimbleby (``Dim'') Waveral, phones with the news that Rhys's financial advisor, ``that bloody deviant, Gavin Winterton,'' has just sold him short in the stock market crash of '87. What to do? With stoic sighs, Rhys (a.k.a. Dorhys, Dorita, Lady Beth Fraser, etc.) runs off on his lovely, accident-prone wife Adrienne to return to his old profession, agreeing to accompany hideous Rikki Lancaster, ``the Duchess,'' and her lesbian medium companion, Elida Schumann, to Tangiers for a week of torrid, expensive passion. As Dim takes off for Paris to have it out with his wayward son, and Rhys's friend Peach Delight takes it on herself to dazzle him with Ecstasy and dÇcolletage, Rhys plunges into a furious carnival of grotesques—from Sir Maurice Goodbuns to Little Beige Riding Hood—all coming together (so to speak) for a memorable climax at Ashby de la Zouche's costume extravaganza, the 1988 Fruit Ball. Since Everett hasn't Joe Orton's command of the mechanics of farce, Rhys's riotous, in-your-face odyssey finally comes across as sad and a little boring. But readers hungry for the latest sex-and- drugs update on the too-too beautiful people, darling, could make this a hit anyway.

Pub Date: Sept. 22, 1992

ISBN: 0-688-11786-4

Page Count: 240

Publisher: Morrow/HarperCollins

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 1, 1992

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BETWEEN SISTERS

Briskly written soap with down-to-earth types, mostly without the lachrymose contrivances of Hannah’s previous titles...

Sisters in and out of love.

Meghann Dontess is a high-powered matrimonial lawyer in Seattle who prefers sex with strangers to emotional intimacy: a strategy bound to backfire sooner or later, warns her tough-talking shrink. It’s advice Meghann decides to ignore, along with the memories of her difficult childhood, neglectful mother, and younger sister. Though she managed to reunite Claire with Sam Cavenaugh (her father but not Meghann’s) when her mother abandoned both girls long ago, Meghann still feels guilty that her sister’s life doesn’t measure up, at least on her terms. Never married, Claire ekes out a living running a country campground with her dad and is raising her six-year-old daughter on her own. When she falls in love for the first time with an up-and-coming country musician, Meghann is appalled: Bobby Austin is a three-time loser at marriage—how on earth can Claire be so blind? Bobby’s blunt explanation doesn’t exactly satisfy the concerned big sister, who busies herself planning Claire’s dream wedding anyway. And, to relieve the stress, she beds various guys she picks up in bars, including Dr. Joe Wyatt, a neurosurgeon turned homeless drifter after the demise of his beloved wife Diane (whom he euthanized). When Claire’s awful headache turns out to be a kind of brain tumor known among neurologists as a “terminator,” Joe rallies. Turns out that Claire had befriended his wife on her deathbed, and now in turn he must try to save her. Is it too late? Will Meghann find true love at last?

Briskly written soap with down-to-earth types, mostly without the lachrymose contrivances of Hannah’s previous titles (Distant Shores, 2002, etc.). Kudos for skipping the snifflefest this time around.

Pub Date: May 1, 2003

ISBN: 0-345-45073-6

Page Count: 400

Publisher: Ballantine

Review Posted Online: June 24, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: April 1, 2003

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THE ALCHEMIST

Coelho's placebo has racked up impressive sales in Brazil and Europe. Americans should flock to it like gulls.

Coelho is a Brazilian writer with four books to his credit. Following Diary of a Magus (1992—not reviewed) came this book, published in Brazil in 1988: it's an interdenominational, transcendental, inspirational fable—in other words, a bag of wind. 

 The story is about a youth empowered to follow his dream. Santiago is an Andalusian shepherd boy who learns through a dream of a treasure in the Egyptian pyramids. An old man, the king of Salem, the first of various spiritual guides, tells the boy that he has discovered his destiny: "to realize one's destiny is a person's only real obligation." So Santiago sells his sheep, sails to Tangier, is tricked out of his money, regains it through hard work, crosses the desert with a caravan, stops at an oasis long enough to fall in love, escapes from warring tribesmen by performing a miracle, reaches the pyramids, and eventually gets both the gold and the girl. Along the way he meets an Englishman who describes the Soul of the World; the desert woman Fatima, who teaches him the Language of the World; and an alchemist who says, "Listen to your heart" A message clings like ivy to every encounter; everyone, but everyone, has to put in their two cents' worth, from the crystal merchant to the camel driver ("concentrate always on the present, you'll be a happy man"). The absence of characterization and overall blandness suggest authorship by a committee of self-improvement pundits—a far cry from Saint- Exupery's The Little Prince: that flagship of the genre was a genuine charmer because it clearly derived from a quirky, individual sensibility. 

 Coelho's placebo has racked up impressive sales in Brazil and Europe. Americans should flock to it like gulls.

Pub Date: July 1, 1993

ISBN: 0-06-250217-4

Page Count: 192

Publisher: N/A

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: May 1, 1993

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