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OSCAR J

SKIPPER CAN NO LONGER PLAY . . . AND "DADDY CAN NO LONGER STAY"

A compassionate guide that can help parents and kids with tough questions.

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A debut book steers young readers and their families through experiences of loss.

Twin stories in rhyming verses gently treat the death of a pet dog and parental divorce. The language is simple, often lilting, and should be attractive to grade school readers. Adolphe’s list of definitions at the back of each tale welcomes children to the pleasures of learning more words. Some entries seem a bit surprising, such as “Die/Died,” given the obvious subject matter of the volume, but others are both charming and important: “Embrace” (“to put arms around someone”), “Grief,” “Love,” “Embarrassed,” and “Ashamed.” The list encourages readers to accept the truth of their feelings. “Skipper Can No Longer Play” tells the story of a beloved dog who ages, still eager to see his boy, Oscar J, but is slowing down in his activities and agility. One day when Oscar comes home from school, Skip is gone. Mom explains that this disappearance is difficult but necessary: “Just as each year green leaves age, / Turn brown and fall dead from a tree, / All that is now living one day will die.” At first, Oscar thinks it must be his fault, for not minding his mother or not eating his vegetables, but she reassures him that something more mysterious is at work, and that Skip can be held in the memory. “Memory” and “Imagination” would have been useful terms for the definitions list, as they name the abstract concepts the book works hard to illustrate through narrative and dialogue. Oscar’s resourceful mother tells him to picture Skip frolicking and running, even misbehaving. As the mental images add up, some with humorous memories attached, the pain lessens. “Daddy Can No Longer Stay” likewise reaches for a comforting, positive outcome; Oscar is still not to blame, and he can look forward to seeing his father often, just in a different house. “So,” asks Oscar, “does this mean you both still love me and want me as your son?” His dad answers that they were the “proudest parents on earth!” the very day he was born.

A compassionate guide that can help parents and kids with tough questions.

Pub Date: Dec. 10, 2013

ISBN: 978-1-4918-7992-4

Page Count: 54

Publisher: AuthorHouseUK

Review Posted Online: May 29, 2017

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HOW NOT TO HATE YOUR HUSBAND AFTER KIDS

A highly readable account of how solid research and personal testing of self-help techniques saved a couple's marriage after...

Self-help advice and personal reflections on avoiding spousal fights while raising children.

Before her daughter was born, bestselling author Dunn (Why Is My Mother Getting a Tattoo?: And Other Questions I Wish I Never Had to Ask, 2009, etc.) enjoyed steady work and a happy marriage. However, once she became a mother, there never seemed to be enough time, sleep, and especially help from her husband. Little irritations became monumental obstacles between them, which led to major battles. Consequently, they turned to expensive couples' therapy to help them regain some peace in life. In a combination of memoir and advice that can be found in most couples' therapy self-help books, Dunn provides an inside look at her own vexing issues and the solutions she and her husband used to prevent them from appearing in divorce court. They struggled with age-old battles fought between men and women—e.g., frequency of sex, who does more housework, who should get up with the child in the middle of the night, why women need to have a clean house, why men need more alone time, and many more. What Dunn learned via therapy, talks with other parents, and research was that there is no perfect solution to the many dynamics that surface once couples become parents. But by using time-tested techniques, she and her husband learned to listen, show empathy, and adjust so that their former status as a happy couple could safely and peacefully morph into a happy family. Readers familiar with Dunn's honest and humorous writing will appreciate the behind-the-scenes look at her own semi-messy family life, and those who need guidance through the rough spots can glean advice while being entertained—all without spending lots of money on couples’ therapy.

A highly readable account of how solid research and personal testing of self-help techniques saved a couple's marriage after the birth of their child.

Pub Date: March 21, 2017

ISBN: 978-0-316-26710-6

Page Count: 272

Publisher: Little, Brown

Review Posted Online: Jan. 17, 2017

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 1, 2017

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PERMISSION TO FEEL

UNLOCKING THE POWER OF EMOTIONS TO HELP OUR KIDS, OURSELVES, AND OUR SOCIETY THRIVE

An intriguing approach to identifying and relating to one’s emotions.

An analysis of our emotions and the skills required to understand them.

We all have emotions, but how many of us have the vocabulary to accurately describe our experiences or to understand how our emotions affect the way we act? In this guide to help readers with their emotions, Brackett, the founding director of Yale University’s Center for Emotional Intelligence, presents a five-step method he calls R.U.L.E.R.: We need to recognize our emotions, understand what has caused them, be able to label them with precise terms and descriptions, know how to safely and effectively express them, and be able to regulate them in productive ways. The author walks readers through each step and provides an intriguing tool to use to help identify a specific emotion. Brackett introduces a four-square grid called a Mood Meter, which allows one to define where an emotion falls based on pleasantness and energy. He also uses four colors for each quadrant: yellow for high pleasantness and high energy, red for low pleasantness and high energy, green for high pleasantness and low energy, and blue for low pleasantness and low energy. The idea is to identify where an emotion lies in this grid in order to put the R.U.L.E.R. method to good use. The author’s research is wide-ranging, and his interweaving of his personal story with the data helps make the book less academic and more accessible to general readers. It’s particularly useful for parents and teachers who want to help children learn to handle difficult emotions so that they can thrive rather than be overwhelmed by them. The author’s system will also find use in the workplace. “Emotions are the most powerful force inside the workplace—as they are in every human endeavor,” writes Brackett. “They influence everything from leadership effectiveness to building and maintaining complex relationships, from innovation to customer relations.”

An intriguing approach to identifying and relating to one’s emotions.

Pub Date: Sept. 3, 2019

ISBN: 978-1-250-21284-9

Page Count: 320

Publisher: Celadon Books

Review Posted Online: June 22, 2019

Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 15, 2019

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