A candid and moving account that’s buoyed by humor.
A debut author reflects on loss, surviving trauma, and finding oneself in this memoir.
“I was the guy people envied for ‘always having a smile,’” writes Toler, noting that behind “the jokes, the energy, the charisma” was “the kid sitting beside his mother’s oxygen machine, watching her sort through bills she had no way to cover.” These lines, in many ways, capture the ethos of the book, which evocatively juxtaposes the author’s gregarious personality with the harsh realities of a life full of hardship. Although many of Toler’s experiences from childhood through adulthood are certainly distressing—from his single mother’s constant battle with a barrage of medical emergencies when he was a child, to his partner’s diagnosis of cancer—the book is particularly adept at capturing how his childhood feeling that he didn’t belong continued to reverberate into adulthood. As a kindergartner with ADHD, he notes that his inherent loudness and desire to constantly “color past the borders on purpose” made him the frequent target of discipline by his teachers. Later, as a devout Christian who sought a sense of belonging in conservative evangelical youth groups, he heard pastors preach that being gay was an “abomination.” (“I never felt ‘Christian enough,’” he writes, because he “carried the constant ache that I was letting God down.”) As the work moves into Toler’s early adulthood, he effectively captures the millennial milieu of life as a gay man in the American South of the early 2000s, which he describes as an atmosphere with “an underlying discomfort everyone pretended not to notice.” Interestingly, although his outgoing, over-the-top personality drew teachers’ ire, it prepared him for a brief period as a stand-up comedian who would eventually perform at Atlanta’s Laughing Skull Lounge (where he would learn the trade under the tutelage of the wildly successful comic Margaret Cho). Although Toler’s absorbing volume doesn’t shy away from the harsh realities of life, it is relentlessly optimistic and effectively blends his personal narrative with poignant observations on life in general. Overall, it feels well tailored to readers who might be experiencing similar heartaches and a thirst for belonging.
A candid and moving account that’s buoyed by humor.Pub Date: June 1, 2026
ISBN: 9781971718248
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Ripples Media
Review Posted Online: June 24, 2026
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.
A former New York City dancer reflects on her zesty heyday in the 1970s.
Discovered on a Manhattan street in 2020 and introduced on Stanton’s Humans of New York Instagram page, Johnson, then 76, shares her dynamic history as a “fiercely independent” Black burlesque dancer who used the stage name Tanqueray and became a celebrated fixture in midtown adult theaters. “I was the only black girl making white girl money,” she boasts, telling a vibrant story about sex and struggle in a bygone era. Frank and unapologetic, Johnson vividly captures aspects of her former life as a stage seductress shimmying to blues tracks during 18-minute sets or sewing lingerie for plus-sized dancers. Though her work was far from the Broadway shows she dreamed about, it eventually became all about the nightly hustle to simply survive. Her anecdotes are humorous, heartfelt, and supremely captivating, recounted with the passion of a true survivor and the acerbic wit of a weathered, street-wise New Yorker. She shares stories of growing up in an abusive household in Albany in the 1940s, a teenage pregnancy, and prison time for robbery as nonchalantly as she recalls selling rhinestone G-strings to prostitutes to make them sparkle in the headlights of passing cars. Complemented by an array of revealing personal photographs, the narrative alternates between heartfelt nostalgia about the seedier side of Manhattan’s go-go scene and funny quips about her unconventional stage performances. Encounters with a variety of hardworking dancers, drag queens, and pimps, plus an account of the complexities of a first love with a drug-addled hustler, fill out the memoir with personality and candor. With a narrative assist from Stanton, the result is a consistently titillating and often moving story of human struggle as well as an insider glimpse into the days when Times Square was considered the Big Apple’s gloriously unpolished underbelly. The book also includes Yee’s lush watercolor illustrations.
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.Pub Date: July 12, 2022
ISBN: 978-1-250-27827-2
Page Count: 192
Publisher: St. Martin's
Review Posted Online: July 27, 2022
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.
The iconic model tells the story of her eventful life.
According to the acknowledgments, this memoir started as "a fifty-page poem and then grew into hundreds of pages of…more poetry." Readers will be glad that Anderson eventually turned to writing prose, since the well-told anecdotes and memorable character sketches are what make it a page-turner. The poetry (more accurately described as italicized notes-to-self with line breaks) remains strewn liberally through the pages, often summarizing the takeaway or the emotional impact of the events described: "I was / and still am / an exceptionally / easy target. / And, / I'm proud of that." This way of expressing herself is part of who she is, formed partly by her passion for Anaïs Nin and other writers; she is a serious maven of literature and the arts. The narrative gets off to a good start with Anderson’s nostalgic memories of her childhood in coastal Vancouver, raised by very young, very wild, and not very competent parents. Here and throughout the book, the author displays a remarkable lack of anger. She has faced abuse and mistreatment of many kinds over the decades, but she touches on the most appalling passages lightly—though not so lightly you don't feel the torment of the media attention on the events leading up to her divorce from Tommy Lee. Her trip to the pages of Playboy, which involved an escape from a violent fiance and sneaking across the border, is one of many jaw-dropping stories. In one interesting passage, Julian Assange's mother counsels Anderson to desexualize her image in order to be taken more seriously as an activist. She decided that “it was too late to turn back now”—that sexy is an inalienable part of who she is. Throughout her account of this kooky, messed-up, enviable, and often thrilling life, her humility (her sons "are true miracles, considering the gene pool") never fails her.
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.Pub Date: Jan. 31, 2023
ISBN: 9780063226562
Page Count: 256
Publisher: Dey Street/HarperCollins
Review Posted Online: Dec. 5, 2022
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 1, 2023
SEEN & HEARD
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