A probing, often surprising memoir about the search for the self.
Friedman recounts a journey of discovery, drugs, and travel in this debut memoir.
The author thought she had finally found the perfect fiance—kind, considerate, wealthy, a good cook—only to have him end their engagement with little explanation. The breakup coincided with Friedman’s disillusionment with her doctoral program and new worries about her ability to find a job. She was acutely aware that she had no firm direction in life: “My mom’s calling was in reproductive justice and Indigenous rights,” writes the author. “My sister’s was in anti-slavery and corporate responsibility. My calling was…shopping for pretty dresses? Getting good grades on tests that don’t measure anything meaningful? Falling for men who claim to love me then don’t?” With her life in a spiral, she impulsively flew to Costa Rica for a yoga teacher training retreat, thinking that a new environment and a ton of yoga might turn things around. Her laptop was stolen almost immediately upon landing, and the yoga turned out to be harder than any she had ever done, but she had a spiritual experience one night while sitting alone at the edge of the property: a voice, telling her, “You were born.” The moment unlocked something in Friedman. She would later consider it her first psychedelic experience, even though she had not taken any substances. When the retreat ended, the author returned to Chicago with her mind newly opened. It was only the beginning of what would turn out to be a six-year journey of self-discovery, one revolving around travel and experimenting with psychedelic drugs (ironic, since one of the goals of her yoga retreat was to quit smoking weed). This memoir is an account of that journey: eating magic mushrooms with her dad in Amsterdam, dropping acid on the Big Island in Hawaii, and celebrating her 30th birthday with an ayahuasca ceremony. From San Francisco to Barcelona to Marrakesh, she pushed the boundaries of reality to discover the sources of her shame and open herself up to the love she had always desired.
Friedman writes in an engagingly chatty style that blends well with her descriptions of her chemical adventures. Here she describes the realization, during a trip on psychedelic truffles, that she needed to cut off her hair: “[M]y hair hung heavy and limp, pulled down by gravity, leaching me of energy. It was history and story—baggage, inherited, in HAIR it is! I thought about all that had happened in the past decade that I didn’t want to hold onto, and thought about it being stored in my hair.” The author, who comes from a wealthy family, frequently expresses the guilt she feels for being “born into privilege,” an anxiety that exacerbated her early paralysis. These reminders do not necessarily endear her to the reader, though they do explain her ability to travel so frequently. The book is not quite Eat, Pray, Love on psychedelics, as its premise might suggest—it isn’t as glamorous, it sometimes borders on repetitiveness, and the quest terminates in a surprisingly down-to-earth place. Even so, many seekers will find a bit of themselves on Friedman’s trips.
A probing, often surprising memoir about the search for the self.Pub Date: June 4, 2024
ISBN: 9781964437019
Page Count: 342
Publisher: Boldspark
Review Posted Online: May 12, 2024
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.
A former New York City dancer reflects on her zesty heyday in the 1970s.
Discovered on a Manhattan street in 2020 and introduced on Stanton’s Humans of New York Instagram page, Johnson, then 76, shares her dynamic history as a “fiercely independent” Black burlesque dancer who used the stage name Tanqueray and became a celebrated fixture in midtown adult theaters. “I was the only black girl making white girl money,” she boasts, telling a vibrant story about sex and struggle in a bygone era. Frank and unapologetic, Johnson vividly captures aspects of her former life as a stage seductress shimmying to blues tracks during 18-minute sets or sewing lingerie for plus-sized dancers. Though her work was far from the Broadway shows she dreamed about, it eventually became all about the nightly hustle to simply survive. Her anecdotes are humorous, heartfelt, and supremely captivating, recounted with the passion of a true survivor and the acerbic wit of a weathered, street-wise New Yorker. She shares stories of growing up in an abusive household in Albany in the 1940s, a teenage pregnancy, and prison time for robbery as nonchalantly as she recalls selling rhinestone G-strings to prostitutes to make them sparkle in the headlights of passing cars. Complemented by an array of revealing personal photographs, the narrative alternates between heartfelt nostalgia about the seedier side of Manhattan’s go-go scene and funny quips about her unconventional stage performances. Encounters with a variety of hardworking dancers, drag queens, and pimps, plus an account of the complexities of a first love with a drug-addled hustler, fill out the memoir with personality and candor. With a narrative assist from Stanton, the result is a consistently titillating and often moving story of human struggle as well as an insider glimpse into the days when Times Square was considered the Big Apple’s gloriously unpolished underbelly. The book also includes Yee’s lush watercolor illustrations.
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.Pub Date: July 12, 2022
ISBN: 978-1-250-27827-2
Page Count: 192
Publisher: St. Martin's
Review Posted Online: July 27, 2022
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.
The iconic model tells the story of her eventful life.
According to the acknowledgments, this memoir started as "a fifty-page poem and then grew into hundreds of pages of…more poetry." Readers will be glad that Anderson eventually turned to writing prose, since the well-told anecdotes and memorable character sketches are what make it a page-turner. The poetry (more accurately described as italicized notes-to-self with line breaks) remains strewn liberally through the pages, often summarizing the takeaway or the emotional impact of the events described: "I was / and still am / an exceptionally / easy target. / And, / I'm proud of that." This way of expressing herself is part of who she is, formed partly by her passion for Anaïs Nin and other writers; she is a serious maven of literature and the arts. The narrative gets off to a good start with Anderson’s nostalgic memories of her childhood in coastal Vancouver, raised by very young, very wild, and not very competent parents. Here and throughout the book, the author displays a remarkable lack of anger. She has faced abuse and mistreatment of many kinds over the decades, but she touches on the most appalling passages lightly—though not so lightly you don't feel the torment of the media attention on the events leading up to her divorce from Tommy Lee. Her trip to the pages of Playboy, which involved an escape from a violent fiance and sneaking across the border, is one of many jaw-dropping stories. In one interesting passage, Julian Assange's mother counsels Anderson to desexualize her image in order to be taken more seriously as an activist. She decided that “it was too late to turn back now”—that sexy is an inalienable part of who she is. Throughout her account of this kooky, messed-up, enviable, and often thrilling life, her humility (her sons "are true miracles, considering the gene pool") never fails her.
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.Pub Date: Jan. 31, 2023
ISBN: 9780063226562
Page Count: 256
Publisher: Dey Street/HarperCollins
Review Posted Online: Dec. 5, 2022
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 1, 2023
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