Established Roiphe admirers will add this to their collections; those exploring the complexities of marriage will find an...
An extended reflection on the rewards of marriage from the author of Fruitful (1996), itself an eloquent polemic in defense of bearing and raising children.
The essential message here is that marriage is hard but worth the work. The summary may seem pat, but the discussion is not. As befits the author of a feminist classic (Up the Sandbox, 1970), Roiphe pokes at all sides of the marriage bed. Why, she asks, considering current sexual freedoms, greater economic opportunities for women, and the high divorce rate, would people today want to enter what is still viewed as a lifelong commitment? Because, she believes, a gratifying marriage “assuages our loneliness” and tempers the sharp edges of character without distorting individual essence. “Twoness” matters. In addition, marriage creates a workable framework in which to have children, clearly the most significant experience in the author’s life. Roiphe is not against divorce, which ended her own first marriage, praising it as a release “from what Milton has called the ‘God forbidden loneliness’ of marital unhappiness.” Arranged marriages also receive measured approval; the author beams on fictional Bridget Jones’s ultimate choice of the man Bridget’s mother had in mind all the time. (It seems hardly coincidental that Roiphe had three unmarried daughters when she wrote this book.) Living together is problematic, she concludes, because of the emotional injuries that lie in store when a couple breaks up. However, Roiphe doesn’t neglect the pitfalls of marriage: the danger of merging into your mate, boredom (sexual and otherwise), tensions caused by children, midlife crises, the minefield of expanded families—all are given due thought. Unfortunately, her provocative deliberations are undermined by a rambling style punctuated by occasionally inexplicable references, such as one to Louisa May Alcott’s husband. (Alcott never married.)
Established Roiphe admirers will add this to their collections; those exploring the complexities of marriage will find an idiosyncratic expression of familiar views.Pub Date: May 14, 2002
ISBN: 0-465-07066-3
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Basic Books
Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 15, 2002
Mostly conservative in its stance and choices but common-sensical and current.
Savvy counsel and starter lists for fretting parents.
New York Times Book Review editor Paul (My Life With Bob: Flawed Heroine Keeps Book of Books, Plot Ensues, 2017, etc.) and Russo, the children’s book editor for that publication, provide standard-issue but deftly noninvasive strategies for making books and reading integral elements in children’s lives. Some of it is easier said than done, but all is intended to promote “the natural, timeless, time-stopping joys of reading” for pleasure. Mediumwise, print reigns supreme, with mild approval for audio and video books but discouraging words about reading apps and the hazards of children becoming “slaves to the screen.” In a series of chapters keyed to stages of childhood, infancy to the teen years, the authors supplement their advice with short lists of developmentally appropriate titles—by their lights, anyway: Ellen Raskin’s Westing Game on a list for teens?—all kitted out with enticing annotations. The authors enlarge their offerings with thematic lists, from “Books That Made Us Laugh” to “Historical Fiction.” In each set, the authors go for a mix of recent and perennially popular favorites, leaving off mention of publication dates so that hoary classics like Janice May Udry’s A Tree Is Nice seem as fresh as David Wiesner’s Flotsam and Carson Ellis’ Du Iz Tak? and sidestepping controversial titles and themes in the sections for younger and middle-grade readers—with a few exceptions, such as a cautionary note that some grown-ups see “relentless overparenting” in Margaret Wise Brown’s Runaway Bunny. Laura Ingalls Wilder’s Little House series doesn’t make the cut except for a passing reference to its “troubling treatment of Indians.” The teen lists tend to be edgier, salted with the provocative likes of Art Spiegelman’s Maus and Angie Thomas’ The Hate U Give, and a nod to current demands for more LGBTQ and other #ownvoices books casts at least a glance beyond the mainstream. Yaccarino leads a quartet of illustrators who supplement the occasional book cover thumbnails with vignettes and larger views of children happily absorbed in reading.
Mostly conservative in its stance and choices but common-sensical and current.Pub Date: Sept. 3, 2019
ISBN: 978-1-5235-0530-2
Page Count: 216
Publisher: Workman
Review Posted Online: July 27, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Aug. 15, 2019
BOOK REVIEW
BOOK REVIEW
BOOK REVIEW
Romance feels deeply liberating in Zalmanek’s hands.
Stories and guidance designed to keep the fires burning in your relationship.
This book is about adventures, unusual and exciting experiences in love–particularly with established couples–that speak of abiding affection. And they speak loudly, because you have to work to keep these adventures moving. They range from daily, loving gestures–the little threads that sew you together–to grand celebrations. Zalmanek, a self-proclaimed “Romantic Adventurer,” begins with the baby steps needed to get started. Fearless where she treads, Zalmanek is happy to give tips on everything from marriage proposals to divorce ceremonies. Each chapter is filled with episodes of romantic adventure intended to jump-start the imagination in the form of illustrative stories from people who have taken one of her workshops. She stresses the importance of being an attentive and aware mate–to understand your lover’s surprise quotient, for example–to explore the sensual acts that please the two of you, to learn how to give (and receive) unexpected gifts and to develop your own romantic traditions. She wants you to cherish the act of intimacy, to step back for a moment, regain some perspective and realize how important it is to keep adding fuel to the fire that drives your romance. Best of all, she makes it sound like an awful lot of fun.
Romance feels deeply liberating in Zalmanek’s hands.Pub Date: Jan. 1, 2006
ISBN: 0-9766879-0-9
Page Count: -
Publisher: N/A
Review Posted Online: May 23, 2010
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
© Copyright 2025 Kirkus Media LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Follow
Popular in this Genre
We can’t wait for you to join Kirkus!
It’s free and takes less than 10 seconds!
Already have an account? Log in.
OR
Sign in with GoogleTrouble signing in? Retrieve credentials.
Welcome Back!
OR
Sign in with GoogleTrouble signing in? Retrieve credentials.
