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THE DIRTY PARTS OF THE BIBLE

A good-humored but incurably cornball tale.

Naïve, sex-starved son of a hellfire Baptist preacher sets out across Depression-era America to find his father’s hidden fortune and save his family.

Tobias Henry, a self-proclaimed “bad Baptist,” narrates his own coming-of-age story with an eye for the absurd and a pseudo-Twain-like twang. When his father is blinded in an accident (a bird craps in his eye), Tobias is dispatched to Texas with only $37, a little biblical knowledge and a map that will lead him to buried treasure on the old family farm. Hapless and preoccupied by opposing feelings of piety and lust, Tobias loses the treasure map, and a prostitute takes all his money, leaving him a virgin. An old, Longfellow-quoting, oddly philo-Semitic black hobo named Craw then adopts him. Together, they ride the rails, take refuge in hobo jungles and witness the despair Hoover’s Depression has wrought. Craw is bawdy, mischievous, yet Wise, with a capital “W.” He imparts home cures and truths about snakebites, Jesus, sex, love and life to his clueless pupil. Once in Texas, and welcomed into the bosom of his eccentric family, Tobias falls in love with Sarah, a prickly but pretty farmhand. Before they can be together, though, he must dispel the old Indian curse that haunts Sarah and killed off her previous beau. At times sweet and funny, Conner’s novel is ultimately an attempt at Twainian allegory without key components: no moral center, weak symbolism, no raft and no river. The hobo’s long line of boxcars can’t replace the mighty Mississippi, and without that grand metaphor–and Twain’s mastery at spinning yarns–readers are left wading in shallow waters.

A good-humored but incurably cornball tale.

Pub Date: July 7, 2007

ISBN: 978-1419-667398

Page Count: -

Publisher: N/A

Review Posted Online: May 23, 2010

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THE THINGS WE DO FOR LOVE

Heartfelt, yes, but pretty routine.

Life lessons.

Angie Malone, the youngest of a big, warm Italian-American family, returns to her Pacific Northwest hometown to wrestle with various midlife disappointments: her divorce, Papa’s death, a downturn in business at the family restaurant, and, above all, her childlessness. After several miscarriages, she, a successful ad exec, and husband Conlan, a reporter, befriended a pregnant young girl and planned to adopt her baby—and then the birth mother changed her mind. Angie and Conlan drifted apart and soon found they just didn’t love each other anymore. Metaphorically speaking, “her need for a child had been a high tide, an overwhelming force that drowned them. A year ago, she could have kicked to the surface but not now.” Sadder but wiser, Angie goes to work in the struggling family restaurant, bickering with Mama over updating the menu and replacing the ancient waitress. Soon, Angie befriends another young girl, Lauren Ribido, who’s eager to learn and desperately needs a job. Lauren’s family lives on the wrong side of the tracks, and her mother is a promiscuous alcoholic, but Angie knows nothing of this sad story and welcomes Lauren into the DeSaria family circle. The girl listens in, wide-eyed, as the sisters argue and make wisecracks and—gee-whiz—are actually nice to each other. Nothing at all like her relationship with her sluttish mother, who throws Lauren out when boyfriend David, en route to Stanford, gets her pregnant. Will Lauren, who’s just been accepted to USC, let Angie adopt her baby? Well, a bit of a twist at the end keeps things from becoming too predictable.

Heartfelt, yes, but pretty routine.

Pub Date: July 1, 2004

ISBN: 0-345-46750-7

Page Count: 400

Publisher: Ballantine

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: May 15, 2004

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MAGIC HOUR

Wacky plot keeps the pages turning and enduring schmaltzy romantic sequences.

Sisters work together to solve a child-abandonment case.

Ellie and Julia Cates have never been close. Julia is shy and brainy; Ellie gets by on charm and looks. Their differences must be tossed aside when a traumatized young girl wanders in from the forest into their hometown in Washington. The sisters’ professional skills are put to the test. Julia is a world-renowned child psychologist who has lost her edge. She is reeling from a case that went publicly sour. Though she was cleared of all wrongdoing, Julia’s name was tarnished, forcing her to shutter her Beverly Hills practice. Ellie Barton is the local police chief in Rain Valley, who’s never faced a tougher case. This is her chance to prove she is more than just a fading homecoming queen, but a scarcity of clues and a reluctant victim make locating the girl’s parents nearly impossible. Ellie places an SOS call to her sister; she needs an expert to rehabilitate this wild-child who has been living outside of civilization for years. Confronted with her professional demons, Julia once again has the opportunity to display her talents and salvage her reputation. Hannah (The Things We Do for Love, 2004, etc.) is at her best when writing from the girl’s perspective. The feral wolf-child keeps the reader interested long after the other, transparent characters have grown tiresome. Hannah’s torturously over-written romance passages are stale, but there are surprises in store as the sisters set about unearthing Alice’s past and creating a home for her.

Wacky plot keeps the pages turning and enduring schmaltzy romantic sequences.

Pub Date: March 1, 2006

ISBN: 0-345-46752-3

Page Count: 400

Publisher: Ballantine

Review Posted Online: June 24, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Dec. 1, 2005

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