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THE WORST STUDENT ON EARTH!

An appealing, space-age Robin Hood/Huckleberry Finn combo.

Awards & Accolades

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In Miltenberg’s (Thank God, 2013, etc.) middle-grade SF novel, a student’s inability to follow instructions during an intergalactic “Career Day” lands him on Earth.

Ryon XYQZ-4973 is proud to be the worst student in the Rigel-Z star system. He regularly finds himself facing disciplinary action from his crabby teacher robot for various offenses, including hacking the school’s system to change his and his classmates’ grades and turning a space-bus invisible. Unsurprisingly, Ryon doesn’t follow the rules during a class trip to the Grand Central Pan Galactic Port Authority Library Museum and Gift Shop; as a result, he’s accidentally transported to Earth. He’s soon taken in by Melissa and Grant Brooks as their ninth foster child. Someone mishears his name as Ryan O’Ryan, and he doesn’t bother to correct them. Instead, he makes several unsuccessful attempts to use his “smartwear”—a full-body suit comprised of “nano-machines”—to return home, and he eventually resigns himself to staying with the Brooks family for the immediate future. He continues creating havoc, however, much to his foster siblings’ amusement—and soon, he even finds himself saving the world. He also stops trying to get home, as he’s happy to simply be “the worst student on Earth.” Miltenberg’s sense of humor makes this book a delightful read. For example, as part of an onion-themed recurring gag, the children attend “Los Miserobles Middle School, Home Of The Fierce Crying Onions,” complete with a giant onion mascot. That said, some other jokes feel crass, such as a character with the surname “Nonads.” Ryon’s humorous predicaments are often the result of good-hearted ambitions gone awry, which makes him a lovable, relatable character. Over the course of the story, Miltenberg tastefully dips into some serious topics, as well, such as immigration, and includes real-life science facts.

An appealing, space-age Robin Hood/Huckleberry Finn combo.

Pub Date: Oct. 6, 2019

ISBN: 978-1-69784-615-7

Page Count: 254

Publisher: Self

Review Posted Online: Jan. 16, 2020

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THE THINGS WE DO FOR LOVE

Heartfelt, yes, but pretty routine.

Life lessons.

Angie Malone, the youngest of a big, warm Italian-American family, returns to her Pacific Northwest hometown to wrestle with various midlife disappointments: her divorce, Papa’s death, a downturn in business at the family restaurant, and, above all, her childlessness. After several miscarriages, she, a successful ad exec, and husband Conlan, a reporter, befriended a pregnant young girl and planned to adopt her baby—and then the birth mother changed her mind. Angie and Conlan drifted apart and soon found they just didn’t love each other anymore. Metaphorically speaking, “her need for a child had been a high tide, an overwhelming force that drowned them. A year ago, she could have kicked to the surface but not now.” Sadder but wiser, Angie goes to work in the struggling family restaurant, bickering with Mama over updating the menu and replacing the ancient waitress. Soon, Angie befriends another young girl, Lauren Ribido, who’s eager to learn and desperately needs a job. Lauren’s family lives on the wrong side of the tracks, and her mother is a promiscuous alcoholic, but Angie knows nothing of this sad story and welcomes Lauren into the DeSaria family circle. The girl listens in, wide-eyed, as the sisters argue and make wisecracks and—gee-whiz—are actually nice to each other. Nothing at all like her relationship with her sluttish mother, who throws Lauren out when boyfriend David, en route to Stanford, gets her pregnant. Will Lauren, who’s just been accepted to USC, let Angie adopt her baby? Well, a bit of a twist at the end keeps things from becoming too predictable.

Heartfelt, yes, but pretty routine.

Pub Date: July 1, 2004

ISBN: 0-345-46750-7

Page Count: 400

Publisher: Ballantine

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: May 15, 2004

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HOME FRONT

Less bleak than the subject matter might warrant—Hannah’s default outlook is sunny—but still, a wrenching depiction of war’s...

 The traumatic homecoming of a wounded warrior.

The daughter of alcoholics who left her orphaned at 17, Jolene “Jo” Zarkades found her first stable family in the military: She’s served over two decades, first in the army, later with the National Guard. A helicopter pilot stationed near Seattle, Jo copes as competently at home, raising two daughters, Betsy and Lulu, while trying to dismiss her husband Michael’s increasing emotional distance. Jo’s mettle is sorely tested when Michael informs her flatly that he no longer loves her. Four-year-old Lulu clamors for attention while preteen Betsy, mean-girl-in-training, dismisses as dweeby her former best friend, Seth, son of Jo’s confidante and fellow pilot, Tami. Amid these challenges comes the ultimate one: Jo and Tami are deployed to Iraq. Michael, with the help of his mother, has to take over the household duties, and he rapidly learns that parenting is much harder than his wife made it look. As Michael prepares to defend a PTSD-afflicted veteran charged with Murder I for killing his wife during a dissociative blackout, he begins to understand what Jolene is facing and to revisit his true feelings for her. When her helicopter is shot down under insurgent fire, Jo rescues Tami from the wreck, but a young crewman is killed. Tami remains in a coma and Jo, whose leg has been amputated, returns home to a difficult rehabilitation on several fronts. Her nightmares in which she relives the crash and other horrors she witnessed, and her pain, have turned Jo into a person her daughters now fear (which in the case of bratty Betsy may not be such a bad thing). Jo can't forgive Michael for his rash words. Worse, she is beginning to remind Michael more and more of his homicide client. Characterization can be cursory: Michael’s earlier callousness, left largely unexplained, undercuts the pathos of his later change of heart. 

Less bleak than the subject matter might warrant—Hannah’s default outlook is sunny—but still, a wrenching depiction of war’s aftermath.

Pub Date: Jan. 31, 2012

ISBN: 978-0-312-57720-9

Page Count: 400

Publisher: St. Martin's

Review Posted Online: Dec. 18, 2011

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 1, 2012

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